[laurreenn]

i am currently in an abusive relationship. it's pretty bad, he makes me very afraid and does not hold back when he is beating me. however, i cannot make myself to leave and i do not even consider that an option. any other ladies been in an abusive relationship? do you understand what i'm talking about and how i feel?

[SimplyElegant]

I know you think it's not an option, but it really is. Can you stay at a close friend's house for awhile until yuo find somewhere or maybe someone in your family? No one should have to put up with any type of abuse. If you stay it'll probably escalate even more because by staying you're putting up with it and basically saying that it's ok because you're too afraid to leave. This is all of his problem and not your fault and you shouldn't have to be afraid of your SO. I've been in a similar situation but not as hard as what you're dealing with. A life without him would really be better for you.

[Darla_G]

there are others that can direct you to specific help, such as shelters etc. Are you living with him? Do you have family or friends you can go to?

[laurreenn]

people tell me that but i can't get the courage to leave. today, i have bruises all over my body. after he's done beating me up, i get into a shiver where my body shakes uncontrollably because i'm afraid and then sometimes he kicks me. i'm terrified of him. but when he's not being abusive he's wonderful.

[luxotika]

I don't care if he is wonderful when he's not abusive. The fact does not change that he is STILL abusive. You need to get out of this situation like yesterday! I don't have any particular advice as I have not been in this situation, but I know others on MuT have been, so they can be of more help. I just want to wish you luck. We will be here to support you in every way we can.

[nosepickle]

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY) - Break the silence, make the call.

Try this link for some support. Call the hotline. Talk to some people who can help you make the right decisions.

[jacquelyna]

That's awful, I really hope you can find the courage to leave, you don't deserve to be in the situation that you're in. I'll keep you in my prayers.

[CoutureLove]

I have never been in an abusive relationship so I guess I cannot really identify with what you are going through. What I do know is that abusive relationships never end well and you need to get away from this guy before he seriously injures you. You need to find strength within yourself to walk away. Do you have friends or family that could help you?

[LittleMissLilo]

You know you ought to leave. It really isn't good for you to be in an abusive relationship, they can lead to much greater and worse things if you dont get out at now. I had a friend stay in a abusive relationship for along time, and after a few months I never heard from her again and I dont even know what happened. I'm honestly scared to know. But in your case, I really hope you make the right decision and that is to leave. Love isn't suppose to make you hurt. Its suppose to make you feel good, never in the word is there abuse.

[shyiskrazy2]

My sister very recently got out of an abusive relationship. You can do it (get out of this relationship) and it is a terrible cycle of nice/meaness. Once he hits you, he will always hit you. My sis's ex would punch and kick her in the face because he wanted her to be ugly. The last thing he did was run over her with his truck and he didn't stop or come back to see if she was okay. You don't want to take the chance of giving him the opportunity to mess your life up. Please get help. Please call somebody you can talk to or get counseling. Please don't think that things will change because he will always be abusive. My heart goes out to you, but you must find courage and strength within yourself. Take care.

[Dragonfly]

So what's holding you to him? Do you have a child with him? Do you own property with him?
The abusive relationship you are in today could change one day.
It could turn into him rotting in jail and you are forever dead.

Do you think that all the woman killed by their partners were not abused by them prior?

Shelters are run by professionals that will help you start over and protect you.
Do not go to a family member or friend, if you decide to leave him.

[sue23]

I have never been in a relationship where a man has hit me.

Are you isolated? Does he control you? Make you feel stupid like you can't make any decisions without him? What does he do to make you feel like you cant leave?

[xoxmonicaxox]

Aww hun I can and totally relate, and I`ll give you some bits and pieces of advice that Ive learned on my experiences. I know A) your probably feeling vulnerable, scared and unstable.. it`s only normal and in situations like that because of the abuse you learn to think differently then what others may perceive things as. `like oh just leave the a$$hole;.. yea it sounds easy but its farrrr from it. And I bet he`s an angel after he`s done hurting you.. they all are and they want to sucker up to you so the next time he does it he even gets more joy out of the power he has on you. Its pathetically sad, and all mind games believe me.
Do you want a man who beats you half of the time, and is nice to you the other half of the time? Or someone that is going to treat you with respect you, PROTECT you, not hurt you all of the time? Look within yourself and you will find some remaining strength.
What I did was ran, and I ran fast. He was sleeping and we were livign together for only like 3 months, I remember shaking and sweating so bad as I packed my stuff as quiet as I can. I gave my friend a call the day before to meet at a specific time..and God helped me that day and happened to have him sleeping round the same time. I grabbed my stuff went to the door and he woke up from the couch and looked at me with this crazy ass look and I told him im giving some of my stuff to my friend cuz i dont use it and im hanging out for a bit.. i closed that door and ran and he punched the wall and i heared him. i never went back.. 3 years later. I relocated to a new town and made a new life. Even though I have the scars and some of the bad memories I also have a new respect on myself for doing what I did. My standards are very high and Im very picky with the man I brought into my life. There are plenty of good people out there, why waste your time with the bad ones? Someones always there for help,and dont be affraid to ask. It might take you time but dont take too much time or risk any more damage.
Im praying for you, keep us updated...

[irkenfetus]

I've never been in this situation, but I know people who have - and thank God they had the strength to leave. For them it wasn't even a question, the first time it happened, they up and left and filed divorce papers lickity split. I know some people just aren't that strong, but you need to understand that leaving IS an option. And when you're being beat, it really is the only one.