[joybelle]

I will try to make this as short as I can.

My sister and her BFF of 18 years broke up over Myspace. (i am still shocked)
The BFF was married to a guy named Jay. The BFF cheated on Jay with her now husband. BFF and Jay where only married 5 months.

Fast forward a year. The BFF is now married with a baby. My sister has mutual friends with Jay. They cross paths. Sister left a blog comment on Jays page. The BFF saw it. Asked my sister what was up and my sister told her. My sister also asked her if you don't want me to talk to him, I won't. The BFF said she didn't mind.

Well, she did mind. I don't get why she just didn't tell my sister.

Fast foward two weeks. Sister gets a message. I thought you said you where not going to talk to him! Blah, blah, blah. This is the first time my sister heard from her since the last convo (see above). During these two weeks my sister took a fall and injured her leg. BFF didn't bother with that though.

Well, Jay had my sister in his top friends. GASP! The BFF told my sister that her NOW husband told her that. What is the new husband doing on the ex-H page? lol

Well, I wrote a blog and the BFF read it. IT had nothing to do with the BFF. She ASSUMED it was about her. So, here new BFF calls my sister and myself a bitc*, childish, ect. on Myspace. (this went nuts) This is a whole other thread though.

This is how I feel:
I told my sister that I couldn't belive that the BFF was so pissed about this. After all, she cheated on him. I have been married and my ex-H cheated on me. I don't care who he talks to. He is no longer in my life. Maybe I look at this different but if you can't trust your best friend, who can you trust? O yeah! She cheated on her husband so she doesn't get trust!!

Who is to say who you can't talk to anyway? Just bc you walked away from them doesn't mean they should not be allowed to be friends with other people in your life.

How do you feel about things like this?

[StereoXGirl]

Ok, if she cheated on her hubby and left him for another man...what on earth would EITHER of them be doing looking on his page other than looking for drama?

Seriously, I'm not big on suggesting that you cut anyone out of yours and your sister's life, but that might be the best in this case. I think you and the sister might be better off without the unnecessary drama of the BFF and her new hubby. If not forever, at least temporarily...

[laurafaye]

Yeah I agree with Shaundra. She shouldn't care less what her ex husband is doing, she cheated on him! I think the BFF is being silly, all of this over myspace as well..

[joybelle]

Right ladies. It seems those who cheat are the ones that can't seem to trust.

[CellyCell]

True. But even if she cheated on jay, I don't see why your sister ought to be talking to her BFF's ex?

I just don't believe in going out with any exes, no matter the cir***stances. But then again, the girl should've said she didn't like it and this drama wouldn't exist.

[joybelle]

They didn't go out.

Yes, she should have said she didn't like it.

[TxKimberly]

I might be the rebel here (imagine that!).
I'm just short of 43 years old, which I'm guessing makes me quite a bit older than most on this forum. One thing I've learned in that time is that a good friend is a wonderful and valuable thing that should not be given up lightly. It's unfortunate but true that often love and lust can create situations that come between friendships. That is a shame as usually the loves and lusts don't last that long, where a good friendship might span a life time.
You are clearly bothered about this or you wouldn't have shared it here. If it bothers you, that implies that the friendship still means something to you. If this is true, then I would speak to the BFF honestly and from the heart. Something along the lines of "I'm sorry that things have resulted in this uncomfortable situation. It's not what I wanted or intended, and your friendship is very important to me - can we forget about it all?"
It does not imply that the situation was of your making (or your sisters) - it only says your not happy with the situation and that you don't want the friendship to end.

[bia910]

well i think no matter what the cir***stances of the split with her ex husband ( even tho cheating on him is messed up), it can still be hurtful when your best friend keeps in touch with them. If she's angry its because she's hurt. whether or not it's right or mature that she feels that way about it, sometimes we just cant help our feelings.

[joybelle]

It didn't happen to me. This is my sister. I had NO friendship with my sisters BFF. I was cheated on in my marriage and I do NOT befriend those that cheat.

The bridge is burned all the way down between the two. Like I said, my sister and myself have been called a bitc* and everything else under the sun by the BFF's new "BFF".

My sister has moved on. My sister grew from this. I am just wondering if I am the only one with this view about how I feel that I posted in the OT.

[pinksugar]

I agree with you - on the one hand, I might be upset if my friends talked to my ex boyfriends, but I would try to hide it, it's not an appropriate reaction for me to have - trying to stop them talking to whoever they please is wrong.

On the OTHER hand, if it truly bothered me, I would have just said so rather than getting all hysterical and angry.

I think it sounds like she's just looking for drama like Shaundra and some of the other ladies have said. It's sad that your sister has lost a long term friendship out of this, but maybe eventually, (even years from now) they will be able to pick up where they left off. Maybe they won't and your sister will be well shot of a dishonest and childish, hysterical person.

Either way, best of luck and sorry it blew up like that

[x33cupcake]

i think that BBF is crazy and needs to calm down..

[magneticheart]

The BFF seems like a major drama queen.
You can't cheat on someone then leave them for someone else and then control who they talk to. I get that some people will say that your sister shouldn't be talking to her BFF's ex-hubby but I disagree. It was the BFF's fault the marriage ended, it was her discision to leave him therefore there's no heart-break going on on her part. If I had an ex who had cheated on me or treat me like crap or dumped me then I wouldn't want my best friend to talk to him but if the ex (like in the situation you're talking about) didn't do anything wrong then it's unfair to disallow your friends from talking to them.
Your sisters BFF seems very controlling and has a very selfish 'I don't want him but no one else can go near him' attitude.
Personally, I don't think you're sister was in the wrong for just talking to the guy and I think she needs to cut this BFF out of her life.

[Bellagigi]

Wow! BFF sounds like she needs to do a lot of growing up. I cannot get over the fact that she cruises her ex's (whom she cheated on) my space page. Could BFF be Bi-Polar or something? I just find it strange that she has been friends for 18 yrs with your sis and she is flying off of the handle all of a sudden. It doesn't really add up. It almost sounds like there are more issues at hand with BFF. She may need help.

[MakeupByMonet]

what the hell is a BFF??Dude Im so not into this computer Myspace crap talk!!! SOrry if I sound dumb But IM reading this thinking what is BFF!!!!

[Ashley]

Best Friends Forever...lol haven't you seen that Cingular text messaging commercial? "IDK, my BFF Rose"