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I've finished my Yves Rocher Sensitive Vegetal mini cream, and I have moved on to a mini glass bottle of The Ghost Oil from Poetic Blend (October 2017 Petit Vour box). One of the great things about the No Buy/Project Use It Up is that it has freed me from my compulsive decluttering. Compulsive decluttering is a real thing that is recognized as a mental health issue. It is a compulsive need to get rid of things and throw things away, in an excessive manner. This is an attempt to control anxiety and other emotions. So many beautiful cosmetics ended up in my garbage pail, not old, well used things, but pretty things I loved and wanted. The compulsive decluttering arose from two primary emotional states, as far as I can tell. The first was unhappiness with my face and hair and appearance. I would try a product once or twice, then look in the mirror and feel disappointed. I felt I did not look any better. So I would throw away the pretty new items and go and look for something else. Now, I never look in the mirror and pick on myself. Instead, I look at my little jars and bottles and see how close they are to being used up. That is the goal now. It has taken the pressure off of using them and looking for a certain result on my face. Once an item is fully used, I know I have done the best I could with my looks, and that is all I can do. And I enjoy the pretty items. If I do see my face and think it looks bad, I just kindly tell myself I am tired from stress or work. In the past, I never gave the pretty lotions and makeup a chance. It takes time for lotions to work, and experimentation to learn to apply a particular makeup product to one's specific facial structure.  The second emotion that drove my compulsive decluttering was anxiety about money, about spending, frustration with wanting more than I could afford. I wanted to control all that, and I felt that by getting rid of the things I could make the anxiety and want go away. I would feel better for a bit after throwing things out, but it never solved my problems. I would go out and buy more the next day. Instead, now I use up all my things up instead of buying new, and I have the anxiety, guilt, and compulsive shopping under control. I threw away so many pretty things, and I regret it so much. I wasted things and money, and hurt myself really badly. I could have enjoyed so much more, saved so much money, been so much happier. The last time I decluttered was in 2017, before I began this No Buy, and it means so much to me.  **I should clarify that the cosmetics thrown away were new, expensive, and nice. I'm not talking about throwing away old, expired, broken things, or things I was allergic to. And it was not just a matter of a few things; it was just about all my things, for years and years, decades. I would buy nice things, use them one or twice, throw them away, and buy more. I hurt myself so much. I am so glad this is gone now.   

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