Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
DreamWarrior

Understanding Engineers

Recommended Posts

As I work with them... I found this to be very funny (and it explains a lot)! LOL!

 

Understanding Engineers #1

 

Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice: The clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway."

 

 

Understanding Engineers #2

 

To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

 

 

Understanding Engineers #3

 

A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with those guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept golf!" The priest said, "Here comes the greens-keeper. Let's have a word with him." He said, "Hello George, What's wrong with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" The greens-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist colleague and see if there's anything she can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"

 

 

Understanding Engineers #4

 

What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.

 

 

Understanding Engineers #5

 

The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

 

 

Understanding Engineers #6

 

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing who must have designed the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." The last one said, "No, actually it had to have been a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"

 

 

Understanding Engineers #7

 

Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.

 

 

Understanding Engineers #8

 

An engineer was crossing a road one day, when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn back into a beautiful princess and stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want." Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess and that I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog - now that's cool."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Because women engineers aren't that anal retentive.  I liked this one the best!!! ... want fries wtih that!!! LOL.  My dad and my husband are engineers.  I've got a science degree and my sister has an arts degree!!!!  SOOOOO FUNNY!!!

 

Understanding Engineers #5

 

The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


LMAO! Soo true!!  I work with a few women engineers and they are AWESOME!!  They have smarts, they have the income, and they dress FABULOUS!  
 

Originally Posted by divadoll View Post

Because women engineers aren't that anal retentive. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

 

Originally Posted by divadoll View Post

 

Because women engineers aren't that anal retentive.

 

You are so right!

 

 

Originally Posted by DreamWarrior View Post

 

 

LMAO! Soo true!!  I work with a few women engineers and they are AWESOME!!  They have smarts, they have the income, and they dress FABULOUS!  

 

Mmmm... The days... LOL!

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Love these! Just read them to my husband; an engineer! We both fell over laughing! All of his friends are engineers... you bet these are on their way to work inbox's through the country!  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

  • NARS Cosmetics Shop Cargo Cosmetics Today!


About MakeupTalk®

© 2003-2020 MakeupTalk.com®, an active online community and message board geared towards members wanting to discuss everything to do with makeup, cosmetics, product reviews, monthly subscription boxes and general beauty related topics. Our community provides product reviews, makeup and general beauty tips. Our most popular topics are subscription boxes and their monthly spoilers. Join our community for free to take part in the conversations and share your own beauty tips and product reviews with others. We look forward to seeing you online here at Makeuptalk®!

MakeupTalk® Facebook

Eye Makeup Reviews

[[Template advancedfooter/front/blocks/pagesBlock is throwing an error. This theme may be out of date. Run the support tool in the AdminCP to restore the default theme.]]

Lips

[[Template advancedfooter/front/blocks/pagesBlock is throwing an error. This theme may be out of date. Run the support tool in the AdminCP to restore the default theme.]]

Makeup Brushes and Tools

[[Template advancedfooter/front/blocks/pagesBlock is throwing an error. This theme may be out of date. Run the support tool in the AdminCP to restore the default theme.]]
×
×
  • Create New...