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perlanga

Need some advice on gift giving guys.

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Hi Everybody,

 

I know it's been awhile but I'm caught in a dilemma. I would like some advice.

I need some advice on giving gifts. Around Christmas I love giving gifts for the kids in my extended family (mostly younger cousins). I have always gotten all the little ones gifts ever since I got a good job a few years ago, I'm a giver and I never expect anything in return.
This year I have decided to spend my extra income on surgery to fix a hernia I sustained as a child. Since it causes me no pain my insurance won’t cover to repair the muscle and I have to dish out thousands to fix it.
I have to budget to fix this and I think it’s well worth it but that means I’ll have to cut corners in a few areas including around xmas. I’ve decided that I’m only giving to my immediate family (mom, dad, two brothers, and my only nephew) and my three godchildren. So that means I’m leaving out many kids, we have a close knit circle of family and friends. I think most people will be understanding of the situation, but how do handle the question of “so and so got a gift but my son didn’t if it comes upâ€? Or do I let the kids parents know up front “I’m on a budget this year and couldn’t get gifts for everybodyâ€, “I’m having surgery and need to budgetâ€? I don’t feel like I should have to explain myself, but I will to avoid hurt feeling amongst the kids. What do you guys suggest?

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You should already let people know that you're tight on money this year because you are undergoing a surgery. They should already know. But, if you're feeling bad about not getting them anything then you could work out little home made gifts for them.

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I agree about perhaps doing some handmade gifts - a few years ago I was rather broke and had a baking spree (small loaves of bread, cupcakes, brownies, cookies) and then packaged an assortment of goodies into different tins and containers. A few years later, I still have relatives mention it. My aunt and uncle always make jam in the summer/fall and they give that with home-made shortbread that is SO GOOD. Is there any way that you coudl do your gift exchange with your immediate family before or after the larger gathering so it's not like you're giving the gift in front of everyone?

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Oooh, that's a good one. Guys love food... Well at least I do, especially baked goods! Yum! :wink:

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How much extended family do you have? Would it be too much to give a family gift to them like a board game or a movie/itunes gift card to rent a movie with a few snacks like popcorn/gummie worms/etc? So basically instead of just give each whole family one thing instead of each child something.

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I don't think you should have to explain yourself of why you do not currently have the budget to spend on gifts but I would just give them a heads up that money is tight for you this year. I agree with the baked goods, you could make everyone a bag of mixed cookies or self-made candy. There are also so many ideas on Pinterest for self-made gifts for kids if you have to give something. Depending on how your budget is next year, you could also always give them a coupon to use next year during summer break for the moviews or something similar.

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What bowskt said is a great suggestion!
Also, One thing I did one year as an add-on to what I had bought (but could easily be a gift in and of itself!) is make homemade beauty things (obviously for the women-folk)...all were so easy and cheap! (I made a peppermint-scented bath salt, a face cream, and honey and sugar scrub...but there are lots of things you can make besides these.) And I put them in cleaned-and-boiled and then cleaned with rubbing alcohol baby food jars that I had from the little one and decorated with a pretty ribbon. :)

But even if you stick with your original plan...you've already explained yourself. The parents should discuss this with the children beforehand so no weirdness arises. Honestly, children usually get SO much anyways...they probably won't even notice/mind.  You aren't obligated to give anything anyways-and I doubt the kids are getting you anything so no guilt haha.

You are super sweet though to be concerned, you really are a giver!

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