- Joined
- Feb 18, 2014
- Messages
- 50
- Reaction score
- 7
I just got married about a year and a half ago and things have been going just fine. The only minor issue we've had is that my husbands ex girlfriend from his early twenties (we are 30 and 32 now) keeps texting or contacting him somehow. At first I was open to meeting her and being friends with her, I thought it was kind of nice that they were still friends. I looked at her as sort of proof that my husband was a kind guy in previous relationships before I came around. I also thought that a relationship from that long ago wasn't relevant now, especially since we were married and she had a steady boyfriend. We went out on a couple double dates and friended each other on facebook, etc.
She seemed like a normal girl.... then all the sudden she de friended me on facebook and I thought that was strange. My husband swore it must have been a mistake... nope it wasn't she defriended me for no reason. Then she started asking my husband about community groups and organizations I had joined, at first she put them down and claimed there were full or "sorostitutes' (sorority type girls). Then a few months later she started joining the same groups (in a different town). She then got engaged... and picked the same wedding weekend/date for her wedding as I did for mine... creepy.
To get to the point... throughout all of this she just keeps poping up with random texts to him. For example, "I just heard a song on the radio and thought of you", or "I'm trying for a new job can I get a reference", or "I'm going to be in town, just letting you know". It wouldn't bother me so much but I feel like she is trying to stay relevant with him or something. My husbands first wife apparently had a serious issue with them communicating. I'm kinda starting to see why. He also gets really defensive when I bring up the situation. Like he might flip out if I asked him to cut of communication or take her off his facebook, I've never asked him to do any of those things btw. We've actually gotten into a couple heated discussions over why it is so important to keep her in his life and why he always defends her actions/reasons for contact. It's almost like he wants me to get jealous or something...
Should I just keep looking at this like it's no big deal or should I ask that he just cut communication? I feel weird demanding who he can and can't talk to.... just not my style. Suggestions?
She seemed like a normal girl.... then all the sudden she de friended me on facebook and I thought that was strange. My husband swore it must have been a mistake... nope it wasn't she defriended me for no reason. Then she started asking my husband about community groups and organizations I had joined, at first she put them down and claimed there were full or "sorostitutes' (sorority type girls). Then a few months later she started joining the same groups (in a different town). She then got engaged... and picked the same wedding weekend/date for her wedding as I did for mine... creepy.
To get to the point... throughout all of this she just keeps poping up with random texts to him. For example, "I just heard a song on the radio and thought of you", or "I'm trying for a new job can I get a reference", or "I'm going to be in town, just letting you know". It wouldn't bother me so much but I feel like she is trying to stay relevant with him or something. My husbands first wife apparently had a serious issue with them communicating. I'm kinda starting to see why. He also gets really defensive when I bring up the situation. Like he might flip out if I asked him to cut of communication or take her off his facebook, I've never asked him to do any of those things btw. We've actually gotten into a couple heated discussions over why it is so important to keep her in his life and why he always defends her actions/reasons for contact. It's almost like he wants me to get jealous or something...
Should I just keep looking at this like it's no big deal or should I ask that he just cut communication? I feel weird demanding who he can and can't talk to.... just not my style. Suggestions?