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Felicia Wood

I Think I Might Be Jealous of My Boyfriend Relationship With his Mom

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I need honest advice, I think my boyfriend relationship with his mom is bizarre. My boyfriend is 28 and he is the true definition of a moms boy. He must call his mom everyday and let her know his where about, she uses him as her own personal slave. She has taught him to completely rely on her and not to depend on a woman besides her (<--- which I kind of understand).

 

Stuff that him and I should be doing together as a couple is almost none existent because she takes up so much of his time. His mom really comes off selfish and inconsiderate, when him and I do spend time together she is always calling asking for something.

 

I bring the subject up to my boyfriend about growing up and being a man and standing on his own two feet and he gets offended. There is a lot more to this story but too much to type but my question is, am I jealous over the relationship he has with his mom or does this seems a little abnormal?

Edited by fefe

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I have been in this situation with an ex (although at the time he was only 23), I think I was always annoyed as I didn't get to spend time with him without interuptions. I would have felt the same if it was a friend or any relative...

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I assume you are not close to your family like he is with his mom.  There are many kids who love spending time with their family .  Since you and him are not on the same page there is no reason to knock him. I think its beautiful he has a close relationship with his mother.  . He is choosing to talk to his mom because he wants to.  Maybe you are being selfish. Maybe you should have a closer relationship with people in your family. Just a thought.    I personally find a guy attractive who is close to his family . I see it as a great quality. Maybe you should have tried to be friends with his mother too.  Sound like you are not close to your own family and maybe this hits a bad spot with you.

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There's a really fine line between being close and being too close. If you really don't get any time together at all without her interrupting then I'd say their relationship/his dependence is a little much. Unfortunately, I don't think there is much you can do. You either need to accept it for what it is or move on.

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I think it's great for your boyfriend and his mother to be close, and relationships are always the better for it. But if it's getting in the way of your own relationship, and it's really as bad as you say, then I would be concerned too.

 

I wouldn't advise speaking to his mum, this is something you and him need to sort out yourselves. Best of luck!

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I think he should learn to give you more time and to spend less time with his mom. At least do you get along with her?

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Guest Barbie2

It does sound like your jealous of his relationship with his mother .
Maybe his mom relys on him because she has no husband perhaps ?
I dont think telling him to be a man is going to work to your advantage he is a grown man he can think for himself and can make his own choices whether they are choices you would like him to make or not is not your decision though.
I think you may need to back off this is family and when it comes to family your not gonna win this fight.It might help if you try to have a relationship with his mother that way you wont be jealous all the time , negative and generally unhappy with the current situation at hand.I mean he is out with his mother not some girl so I dont see why you would be jealous of his own family members but to each their own.If you wanna spend more time with him then do it make time schedule / make a date and time plan it out.Just know if you marry this guy your marrying into his family your not just marrying the guy.

Edited by Barbie2

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I'd try to bring it up in a less insulting way, like "it's time to grow up and be a man" is kind of a blow...

it's hard to not be insulting during arguments but something like telling him how it makes you feel when his mom calls during his time out with you would help him see it from your pov.  I'd be annoyed too.

the good thing is he likes his mom at least. ^_^  lol

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