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sophiafleur

Boyfriend talking to a female''friend''something feels off?ADVICE!

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About almost TWO years ago, my boyfriend who is 37 asked me (28y/o) to do him a favor and to please call his female ”friend” to give her an address (which I looked up and it happened to be of a lawyer as far as I can remember). He wanted ME to do it because the woman’s husband is somehow violent,and jealous even of his own shadow, so basically it seemed to me that this woman in in some sort of abusive or toxic relationship she has 2 children with this man, and supposedly this man has even been in jail in the past, so my bf wanted me to do him the favor of calling her, Just in case the husband picked up the phone out of rage, that way he would think I was just her friend, and would not put her in any danger,,,this man had even called my boyfriend numerous time at midnight to tell him to not engage in conversations with his wife. and also smashed his wife’s computer for talking to much on Facebook and so on.

So 5 days ago,after almost 2 years of not mentioning her whatsoever after that favor he asked me to do, he mentions me this women AGAIN!! and the fact that now she is contacting him because she has ”suicidal” thoughts that she can handle it anymore because she is not happy with her life.., so he was emailing her back trying to talk her out of it,and told me that she is a long time friend and he is concerned of her doing something crazy or wanting to kill herself, But I don’t know what can possibly be going on here that after almost 2 years he mentions me this women again!!! I am very suspicious whether this can be a lover,an ex,What do you think can be happening?I don’t want to be played. gives me a weird vibe.

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That's a tough situation. It could be that your boyfriend is just friends with the women and trying to genuinely help her. Even if she wanted more, it might be difficult considering the situation she is in (if she is still in the abusive relationship). It's very difficult for women to leave an abusive relationship especially if they have been brainwashed by the abuser that they have no power themselves which is how these abusers get their victims to think and act and stay regardless of the abuse. It's really sad. I would honestly ask him about her and ask something like "Are you still friends with her? Last time you mentioned her was couple of years ago? Do you stay in touch with her regularly? What happened with her abusive husband? Are they still together? etc and see how he reacts. You might be able to tell from his reaction and body language what this is all about.  It could be that he is committed to you but truly feels like he wants to help this women get out of the relationship. It's hard to say.

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@@Reija, Yeah its a weird story, I don't know if I buy it,You know I have a strong feeling this woman is his ex girlfriend, for some reason I get that feeling that she was romantically involved with him in the past.Its just that by knowing my boyfriend even if he is a good person, I don't think he would get involved in such drama, that's why I find it weird!. Just my thought, But I will ask him in a smart manner to get the answers I want. B)

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If you have strong feelings about it, it might mean that your are right @sophiafleur. Usually gut feelings end up being are right. :)

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