I suck at life. Or at least maybe at med school?

So yeah, I have finished my 5th year of med school (6 ys total) and I have reached such a low point. I have no motivation to continue, no interest in medical information anymore due to our stupid curriculum ruining all the fun in learning.

I have just found out that I didn´t pass my exam (and yay we only have ONE exam a year, imagine the size of that crap). Just my luck again, I would have needed just ONE more correct answer and I would have only had to retake a tiny piece of the exam which i would have studied for maybe 1 week or 2 max. But no, all that crap again on September 24th.

It´s not the first time either. So 5 years, 5 exams, and I have only passed one of them right away. The others I had to retake completely, or at least parts of it.

It doesn´t even help that every single person knows that this exam isn´t a great way to evaluate if one is gonna become a great doctor or not (it would take too long to explain, our new curriculum is just a joke and who knows what kind of med school grads we´re gonna be with this curriculum) It doens´t help knowing that this exam evaluates who is the best at learning by heart.

All of this doesn´t help. I feel like a complete failure. I never thought med school was gonna be a piece of cake, but I never thought working towards my dream career would destroy my self esteem that much.

I know I will get out of my sappy mood and study and pass it like I always do on the 2nd try. But the problem is that I don´t even want to. I have no motivation left, I just wanna give up on everything. I am sick of trying, really.

End of rant. Start of depression (this smiley describes my mood perfectly right now)

it's one of my favourite smilies too

Anders, you know you're good at this. You know that you'll pass second time. If you really mean it when you say that this is your dream career.... then use that to help you get your motivation back. Visualise your dream job, and imagine how much better it will be, knowing how hard you worked to get there.

I've been through 5 years of uni too, so I completely understand how you feel! the motivation is totally gone. But it's not long now! you can do it! we have faith in you, and you know what? whenever you need to, just show us that and we'll try and cheer you up!

Sometimes it is hard to get motivated. Like Rosie said, you know you can do it. You know you want to be a Doctor and I'm sure you will be a great one. Go for it!!

Andi it sounds like you have come so, so far. I mean 5th year is like such a long road to travel down. I would think maybe thats part of your motivation. wouldn't quitting mean that what you've done so far is thrown away? Maybe you can draw some motivation from that? just focusing on testing seems like BS, but i guess they're trying to make it so anyone can have the answer instantly when someone comes in with some weird ailment

Just think of it as, "almost there"! You really are, time flies by fast anyways. 1 year is better than another 5 or something.

Until you have to take that test, I say just enjoy yourself and de-stress from school. It's tiring, yeah, but one more year! Woop.

If it makes you feel any better - I have about 4 years of school left, haha. I hate school with a passion, but I gotta get it done too :/

Originally Posted by Darla_G /img/forum/go_quote.gif Andi it sounds like you have come so, so far. I mean 5th year is like such a long road to travel down. I would think maybe thats part of your motivation. wouldn't quitting mean that what you've done so far is thrown away? Maybe you can draw some motivation from that? just focusing on testing seems like BS, but i guess they're trying to make it so anyone can have the answer instantly when someone comes in with some weird ailment yeah, I´ve never been a quitter. I´m not serious about quitting, I really want to right now, but I know I can´t and I´d regret it in a second.
I´m not even sure whey they´re testing us like that. The old curriculum consisted of a total of 23 subject-oriented oral exams, and the new one consists of a total of 6 written multiple choice exams, each a mix of different subjects. I am gonna graduate and say I have only had one oral exam in my med school life, which is gonna be on my graduation project paper. Lame, huh?

Originally Posted by CellyCell /img/forum/go_quote.gif Just think of it as, "almost there"! You really are, time flies by fast anyways. 1 year is better than another 5 or something.Until you have to take that test, I say just enjoy yourself and de-stress from school. It's tiring, yeah, but one more year! Woop.

If it makes you feel any better - I have about 4 years of school left, haha. I hate school with a passion, but I gotta get it done too :/

aw poor Cellers, I feel ya. I actually always liked school, that´s why it´s hard for me now. Hating school is a new thing for me. I like to learn new things, but stupid med school has ruined that for me.

Originally Posted by pinksugar /img/forum/go_quote.gif it's one of my favourite smilies too
Anders, you know you're good at this. You know that you'll pass second time. If you really mean it when you say that this is your dream career.... then use that to help you get your motivation back. Visualise your dream job, and imagine how much better it will be, knowing how hard you worked to get there.

I've been through 5 years of uni too, so I completely understand how you feel! the motivation is totally gone. But it's not long now! you can do it! we have faith in you, and you know what? whenever you need to, just show us that and we'll try and cheer you up!



Good to know I´m not alone. Heck, all my friends in school are sick of it all as well. It´s so weird, I wouldn´t mind being in school for 10years if I liked the way they do the classes and stuff. But I don´t, so it´s a drag.
I think I have calmed down already. I will study the parts where I am lacking the most points (4 incorrect answers that are missing to the cutoff amount that is), memorize all the old questions (they usually give a lot of ol ones to the first retake-exam date) and then not give a sh** on the rest. I`m not gonna slip back into depression because of this stupid exam.

You are a young, beautiful, smart, and kind-hearted person with a great fiance and a great future ahead of you!

Good luck on your exam!

It could be worse, remember... LOL. I know it's not a lot of help, but be strong.

I'm sure you don't suck at med school even though you feel that way now. First of all, you've been smart enough to enroll med school and done 5 years there already. You only have one year left which probably will be hard too, but still you're almost done with your school!

You will be able to pass this exam like you did with other exams before. Maybe you could ask some of your friends to study with you, especially the parts that are difficult to you. I understand that things they teach at school seem like bs sometimes, but try to get motivated by thinking all the good experiences you've had with patients during your internships. That might help you to keep motivated and remember why you really wanna become a doctor!

Good luck

Just keep telling yourself you can do it!

You might be depressed about it right now but there's a light at the end of the tunnel! You just need to keep motivated and remind yourself why your doing it and you'll realise that in the end it will all be worth your hard work

Good luck!

I think you're amazing... because that is my dream field, but I never even gave it a try because I figured it would be too hard. You know you can do it, and you will. Sorry you are feeling down, but keep your chin up. You're awesome.

I remember being in college - the last semester was a killer. I was completely burnt out, half the time I didn't care if I graduated or not, and I was in a mild depression.

I did graduate but not with the marks I wanted.

Hang in there kiddo - you are very bright and dedicated; the light is at the end of the tunnel and you will succeed!

Im sorry....I'm sure you will pass it a second time it stinks you have to take it again But completing 5 our of 6 years of med school so far that is awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!

Originally Posted by Carolyn /img/forum/go_quote.gif I remember being in college - the last semester was a killer. I was completely burnt out, half the time I didn't care if I graduated or not, and I was in a mild depression. I did graduate but not with the marks I wanted.

Hang in there kiddo - you are very bright and dedicated; the light is at the end of the tunnel and you will succeed!

lol, that sounds like the year I just put past me. I dragged my ass to all the classes and stuff but the subjects were boring to me. I´m actually looking forward to the next year though, the subjects will be interesting

Originally Posted by bella1342 /img/forum/go_quote.gif I think you're amazing... because that is my dream field, but I never even gave it a try because I figured it would be too hard. You know you can do it, and you will. Sorry you are feeling down, but keep your chin up. You're awesome. aw thanks. I also sorta refused to enroll at first cause I thought I couldn´t do it at all, but my parents thought it would be the right thing for me. After lots of argueing I enrolled thinking "I´m gonna fail at everything and then they´re gonna let me do something easy" which didn´t happen.
I think I just already expect to fail, ugh I have such bad self esteem.

Originally Posted by Lia /img/forum/go_quote.gif It could be worse, remember... LOL. I know it's not a lot of help, but be strong.

lol yeah it could be worse, all the subjects in this exam could be surgery-related (just teasing ya hehe, I know that´s what you wanna do). But thank god it´s internal medicine (again, for like the 100th time lol), surgery, and traumatology/ICU

I don't know how you're feeling, but my husband sure does! He's going to college to become a mechanical engineer, and he's come far enough in the program that everything is so hard. He's had to retake a few classes, and gets really discouraged when he has to retake. Just think of how proud you'll be when you finish!

Aww don't give up now!! 5 years is a lot to throw down the drain! Just imagine how relieved you'll be when this is all over. Think positive thoughts!!!

Aww Andi...just keep in mind that you must be smart to get this far, and you've worked so hard...don't give up now! You're almost there!

Andi,

are you specializing in any particular area?

I was just going to say i think you've got a real good personality for a doctor. Maybe its ok to flunk the class where you learn how to act aloof and scribble all your prescriptions. Just the fact you're anguishing over things right now is such a good sign. You obviously care but realize its not what's going to make you a good doctor.

so good luck!

Okay, I'm a high school drop out so obviously I can't relate, so I thought I'd add some humor to maybe cheer you up

I understand completely. I remember my last 2 yrs of college, I wondered if I was really cut out for engineering. I had to retake a couple classes too... I was depressed most of those 2 yrs. I felt like I was working hard and not reaping the benefits. I felt like the testing was inefficient with ppl cheating and using past papers cuz the questions were repeated every year... But I knew that being an engineer was my dream. So I stuck it out.

Pull yourself up. Fight tooth and nail cuz yr really almost done. It's your dream, and I think it would be worse if you didn't fight for it. Think of how many ppl are waiting for you to break free and come up with some ground breaking method or something (not really good at medical stuff). But you get what I'm saying.

Plus, we're all here rooting for you.

Rest up and go get 'em tiger!