14 years old and my hair is completely ruined??

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Hi everyone (sorry for the long post but I'm desperate)

So I'm 14 (turning 15 in December) and I'm fairly sure I've managed to completely destroy my hair.

From the age of 3 my mother got her hairdresser friend to put various foils and highlights in my hair, and up until I was 11 my hair wasn't really damaged at all from all that - it was just a very ugly dirty blonde/brown mixture. 

So when I turned 12 and started high-school, I finally got permission to dye my hair, so I tried to dye it regular brown (nothing too flashy), but it turned out dark red, and then a few months later we dyed it dark brown, then Mum got sick of the dark colour on me and went to a completely random hairdresser and had them strip it to a hideous brindle (despite her lack of concern for my hair, she has very healthy bleached almost white hair, it just never gets damaged!)

Then a month or so after that it was dyed regular brown with blonde bits, then it was dyed black (well not really, but so much dark brown was layered on that it was for all intents and purposes, black) by this point I was 13 approaching 14 and my hair was very damaged - it looked dreadful, so my mother, ever the intelligent one, had a hairdresser completely strip it, but something went wrong and it came out white with various patches of orange and brown

 So they then toned it down to a gross dirty blonde, and from there I went back to the same hairdresser every 2 or 3 weeks and they gradually kept bleaching it, it went orangey, and then the dreaded brassy yellow. After this my hair was very, very damaged, so my mother just assumed they were doing it wrong and took me to another hairdresser who basically said she didn't want to touch my hair because it was so ruined, but thankfully another hairdresser in the room decided to give it a ago, and she made it a very, very dark greasy-looking blonde. So I went back there a couple of times, gradually getting lighter but it was beginning to go yellow again.

They just kept filling my head with blonde highlights and hoping for the best. One of the hairdressers managed to get it to at least a slightly natural looking dirty blonde, and then a month or two later my Mum put some of John Frieda's blonde dye through my hair, it's still not as light as I'd like it, but it's now so damaged that I'm worried it'll never recover. I'm only 14 and my once pin-straight hair is now in frizzy, uncontrollable waves and is so dry that it looks like it's been completely fried, everything looks split and you can barely run a hand through it without the hairs tangling themselves they're that dry.

Lately I've been trying to repair it by using olive oil and the occasional treatment but it just doesn't seem to be working, which is annoying because my roots are beginning to grow in and make it look strange. So after this ridiculously long post (thanks for sticking around to read it), I ask you hair-care experts, what can I possibly do to repair my hair enough to fix the colour? I hate having a brush full of hair everytime I try to brush it.

Thank you so much for your answers,

xoxox

 
if you want my personal opinion tell your mom to stay the heck away from your hair. what you need right now is to let your hair grow it's natural color and keep having all the dead ends trim until your natural color is grown out enough to have all the dyed hair cut. i know you don't like this but putting color on stripped hair over and over again is only hurting your hair. allow it to grow out. wash your hair with a sls free shampoo. NO coloring for at least 6 months. none, nadda, zip. once your hair grows out it will be healthy again. you can start from scratch and this time don't do color more than 8 week periods. your hair is good that will grow out healthy. right now you have beyond fixing hair.

 
Hair is dead and so once damaged nothing you can do to it will fix it. Best thing to do is get it trimmed regularly. In the mean time try a cholesterol hair pack which you can pick up at Sally's Beauty Supply or even Walmart (in the ethnic hair care area). Wash you hair, damp dry then apply and leave on for a couple of hours then rinse. Like I said nothing you can do will really fix it and if it's "falling out" when brushing you need to NOT brush your hair with what ever brush you are using an instead use a wide tooth comb and a leave-in conditioner and comb your hair in the damp-dry stage (not when it's wet).

 
There have been a few instances where I have had to throw in the towel and cut my hair - bad perm, bad straightening, bad colour after colour.

Hair is dead - couple that with bad colouring - trying to revive it is a wasted of time.

My advice to to find a short cut you would like. Then as your hair grows out (1/2" a month) trim off the remaining unhealthy hair. In 6-8 months, you will have brand new, healthy hair that you can cut and dye to a new style you will like.

In the mean time, stay away from stylists that have no respect for hair and absolutely no more colouring.

 
Get a very good deep conditioner it'll minimize breakage and a oil based treatment for your end if you blow dry.

 
Once you hair is that damaged and dry there really is nothing you can do about it. Luckily your only 14 and hair grows back. You have plenty of time to grow out and experiment with your hair in the coming years. In the mean time, STOP coloring and dying your hair! It will only make it worse. Using olive oil treatments on your hair is good. (good for your scalp too) use a good conditioner for dry, damaged and color treated hair. Don't flat iron, curl or blow dry as the heat will cause more damage and split ends. Get a good trim, or even a short cut and let it grow out. If your natural color is a brown or black and the root growth is too contrasting to your color now, then dye the rest of your hair closer to your natural color using a temporary or semi permenant vegetable based dye that is free of chemicals and damaging ingredients. I suggest manic panic which is actually good for your hair and will condition it. It is very safe, wont damage your hair and can be left on for hours (even over night) they make some pretty wild colors but they also make more natural shades. Also try to only wash your hair 1-2 times a week and get a few inches of root growth before coloring again. Don't worry too much as hair will grow back and it isn't ruined forever.

 
I would definitely (politely) ask mom to stop with all the dying/bleaching she's doing. This is my take on hair: it grows back. I'd personally cut it off and start over. I've done it before myself, a couple of times. I'd stop with the bleaching the hair multiple times as that just strips the hair down to nothing. Condition, condition, condition and once you're all done with that - condition.

 
Ive had the same problem. HAIIIIRRRRR death!!!! I fixed it ? really easy. i got a haircut every 3 months and EVERY week used Palmer's coconut oil treatment.(1.25   the treatment at walmarts.) just let your hair grow back. it works better than anything really expensive. if you wash your hair every other day use it every other day. you get the jits. and STOP WITH THE DYING !!!!!!

 
This is the best answer, IMO. Stop the dying right away because your hair is in such bad condition that its not going to get better no matter what you do to it. All the oils in the world won't bring it back to life because its too far gone. Let it grow, cut it gradually and start with a fresh head of hair and if you want to color it then, only do it every couple of months or so and definitely don't bleach, bleach, and rebleach your hair.

Originally Posted by stlsportsgirl /img/forum/go_quote.gif

STOP COLOURING YOUR HAIR! 

You must stop and stop right now.  You are frying your hair and if you don't stop, you will be forced to shave it and wear a wig....trust me on this one, I have seen it so many time.  Right now your hair is entering that stage.  This isn't a topic to shrug off, your hair is breaking and sounds like it is starting to get into the "gummy" stage, guess what is next, yep, clippers and a wig.

My advice to you would be to find a short hairstyle, think bob, pixie or chine length.  Maybe do something like this:

http://iamsupergorge.com/home/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/vb.jpg

After you get a good short hair cut, next step is deep conditioning once or twice every single week.  I highly recommend Matrix. 

The most important thing is that you do NOT colour your hair for some time.  By some time I am talking months.  Let your hair grow long enough so you can cut all of the damaged hair off, because if you don't you will just keep stressing out your hair and the damage will go into the new hair. 

Once you have ALL new hair, feel free to colour it, BUT never colour it more than 8 weeks.  If you MUST go, ONLY get your roots touched up, there is NO reason to do a complete dye or bleaching more than 8 weeks.  Your hair will not be able to handle that.

It comes down to the simple fact, if you want BEAUTIFUL hair, you have to take care of it.  If you keep bleaching and dying as often as you do, of course it is going to break and fry because you simply aren't treating it correctly.

I hope you take what I said to heart because it is the truth. 
 
So basically you'll have to stop coloring your hair and get a short haircut. Your hair will grow over time and if you get a haircut every 2 months or so, you will get rid of the destroyed hair. I got friends that have gone through this and now their hair is healthier than mine, and I'm jealous
frown.gif


 
I hate to be the barer of bad news... and I'm assuming you don't need anyone to tell you this because it seems as though you know what's going on -- you're going to have to just let your hair grow out. Keep the hideous color (because there's really nothing more that you can do), and let it grow out. Continue to get it cut every 3-6 months so that it grows quickly and easily.
For faster hair growth, if you hair doesn't grow as fast as you'd like, go buy some "hair, skin and nail chews". You can find them in any grocery store, or health store. This will promote healthy hair and make it grow rapidly.
You need to stop doing so much to your hair. Let it grow out until you have nothing more than your natural color and then if you MUST, get it done by a professional and be sure of the color you want, because you've had way too much work done.
I know a girl who went from blonde to black to blonde to black, and I just watched her hair fry, become frizzy, and orange.

Or... shave your head.
I doubt you'll take that route, but just understand that it's not ruined forever. Just until the healthy hair grows out.
 Hope this helped.

 

 
Stop coloring - as others have said - and you will probably need to cut as much of the damage off as you can. This recently happened to a hairdresser friend of mine and she KNEW the risks, too. She went brown to platinum back to light brown and her hair starting falling out in chunks.

Get some Kerastase products. You need the bain de force strengthening shampoo and the lait vital protein treatment. You can also get a salon to do a Keratin treatment on your hair after it has been 3-4 weeks after you last color. This will help immensely, but it will be very $$.

 
Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!! Another fellow teen. Hey, I'm a teenager as well. :D /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> So sorry about your hair :( /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />. All I could say is....... Ask your mum not to allow you to dye your hair and make sure you get it cut around every month. I don't dye my hair, and never will but.... That's about all I can say to help you. Update us once you try anything else. ;) /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />

 
Definitely get a keratin treatment on a regular basis for your hair. They help with hair re-growth and help give your hair the much needed protein it desperately needs right now.

After about 10 treatments you should start seeing improvements (they're only cheap) and definitely please stop dying your hair for a few months! About 9-10 weeks ago my hair was badly damaged after bleaching it so much after having very dark brown hair naturally. I made the mistake of going from a dark brunette to platinum blonde within only a year, but managed to fix it doing the above and the following.

You need to stop using heat on it, yes, even stop using the hair dryer after showers. Towel dry it, if you have to use the hair dryer then use heat protection spray. Wash your hair once or twice a week, constantly use hair masks on it. John Freida, and Lush have some good makes. Leave the mask on for as long as possible and make sure you condition the ends of your hair. For your shampoo and conditioner-John Freida strengthen and repair. Use hair serums especially on the ends. Get regular trims too as this will help.

The next time you dye your hair, go to a professional and don't rush the process if you are going to a very platinum blonde.

 
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