Emotional Abuse I need advice

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Lately my boyfriend has been calling me out of my name for everything that doesn't go his way I have tried talking to him about it and I tell him to stop and respect me like I respect him.His excuse is I was mad at the moment.Last night I lost something of his by accident and I get called a stupid Ass and he leaves me alone with out daughter in our apartment and leaves to his moms house and the next day he acts like nothing happend and when I start talking about it hes like here you go again with your drama.I get blame for Drama all the time I have told him I'm going to leave and he pretends like he does not care and tells me you can't threat me with leaving WTF is going on.What should I do.


 
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I am sorry that you are going through that. If you feel the need to vent, please IM or PM me.

 

han

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well if talking doesnt work then maybe you should call his bluff if hes acting like he dont care, see how much he care when he has to sleep at moms every night untill he cares.

 
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haha, I'm with han. Maybe go to YOUR mum's house, or stay with a friend for a few days. Maybe he will realise how much you mean to him and that it's not ok to treat you like that

 
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Honey, it honestly sounds to me like he's not the man for you! If he's emotionally and VERBALLY abusing you in front of your daughter, what happens when he starts it with her? What is she really learning from watching your interactions with one another? I recall you making a previous post regarding him before, although I cannot pinpoint why (without looking for it). I honestly don't think he's going to change, and something tells me that suggesting even counseling will cause him to flip out! Best of luck, but please do remember to think about at least your daughter's well-being and how this can affect her in life, if not yourself. And remember, we are here for you!


 
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I want to tell you that you need to get out of this relationship. You aren't happy and you and your child deserve so much more. She will take her cues from you the rest of her life. My 1st husband was a mean bastard. I had the "he'll change" way of thinking. It got worse. I wish I could let you see my past. You would not believe the things that were said to me. It left a scar that took me 10 years to get over. Don't do this to yourself anymore and I also remember your last post. Is this how you want to live the rest of your life??? I know the answer is no. Please, please do something about it now. It will not change and the longer he gets away with it the worse it will get. Quit threatening to leave and DO IT!!! People only treat us how we let them and you are giving him permission to treat you like he is. It makes me so sad to think of you living your life like this. You said it in the title of your thread. It's abuse. Think seriously about what you want for your future. If you don't do something about it now then you are already living your future. Keep us updated, ok?

 
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I am with Aquilah on this. To me, there is no "should I stay and give him a chance"...Words cannot be taken back, neither can abusive actions. I told my bf once he starts saying hurtful shit to me or hitting me, its off. I think you should do whats best for you.

 
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I agree with Kelly.

You shouldn't even have to tell him that he's saying hurtful things to you. I'm pretty sure he's aware, He just sounds like an ******* and doesn't care.

 
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^

These ladies have given you some great advice.Dont let him do that to you.Especially in front of your child.

 
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You have received some great advice from women "who have been there." They've been through what you are going through. People don't change if they don't see a problem. Your BF doesn't see a problem, sooo.....he's not going to change.

 
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You have gotten some great advice, but one last thing...if you arent happy, and taken care of, your baby is not happy. Make yourself happy.

 
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I'm sorry to hear about what you are going through. My husband and I went through a very hard time only 1 year after we got married, He was being very abusive to me, to the point of I was afraid of saying anything around him with fear of being called stupid for it. It is not your fault, you did nothing wrong, remember that, because that's what I was thinking the whole time, that I was wrong. Anyways, we took a 2 month break from each other. He went on tour with a band, and i stayed home. I grew up a lot during that time, through reading and journaling. Things changed and we are still together, but I know if we had not taken a break we would probably be broken up now. I didn't have a child to think about, I know that makes things even more difficult. If you need to talk e-mail me: ______ Keep us updated please. Think things through.

 
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Next time he should stay with his mom. I think you need to worry about your future and your child and let him figure out his issues.

 
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I can honestly say when i read this, it felt like i was reading something i would write.. I'm in the same situation and i can understand how easy it is for people to tell you there opinions of what you should do, but in your heart it's easier to say what we want, than to do what is right.. I don't know why guy's think it's ok to treat women with so little respect, I am a mother, and i always saw how my mom was treated by men and i never wanted to put my daughter through the same situations, all you can do is be strong for her.. When things get hard and your being name called, just walk away, ignore him and show him what he say's is just stupidity coming from his mouth, alot of people have told me why don't you just leave, you don't deserve to live in a verbally abusive relationship, but like i said it's easyer to hear what we should do than to act on it.. you can only decide what is best for you and your child and hope in the end you realize you deserve better in life if he's not willing to change..
 
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Originally Posted by julymommy06 /img/forum/go_quote.gif I can honestly say when i read this, it felt like i was reading something i would write.. I'm in the same situation and i can understand how easy it is for people to tell you there opinions of what you should do, but in your heart it's easier to say what we want, than to do what is right.. I don't know why guy's think it's ok to treat women with so little respect, I am a mother, and i always saw how my mom was treated by men and i never wanted to put my daughter through the same situations, all you can do is be strong for her.. When things get hard and your being name called, just walk away, ignore him and show him what he say's is just stupidity coming from his mouth, alot of people have told me why don't you just leave, you don't deserve to live in a verbally abusive relationship, but like i said it's easyer to hear what we should do than to act on it.. you can only decide what is best for you and your child and hope in the end you realize you deserve better in life if he's not willing to change.. I'm sorry you both are going through this. It's a very sad situation and I agree with all the advice given. It's always hard to get to the action and it is true that is easier for people to tell other people in your situation to just leave, but remember that people on the outside are seeing the big picture that the ones in the situation are unable to see sometimes for the mere fact of being part of it.
 
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This is a little different so please indulge me. My Dad is an alcoholic and would steal money from us kids to buy beer. My Mom did everything she could to get him to stop. Eventually she told him to leave and not come back until he had stopped drinking. He hasn't had a drop since.

My point is that sometimes people need to hit the wall and realize just what they are losing before they can change.

 
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I had left before with my mom and I came back thinking things were going to change and things were going to get better I had brought up counseling he said hell no right away.My oldest sister stop talking to me almost for a month when coming back.Its really hard.

 
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