Help me, i think im overreacting over even for a guy's voice!

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hello ladies!

Just need a piece of advice on this or i think im bit crazy...Ive been in and out of bad relationships before and finally my family friend introduced me to a really nice guy.Since he's staying in Paris, we just communicated via mails and messengers.I was sooo happy with him because we had lots of similarities in most of the things..which i hadnt found in any other guys previously..he's very calm and really really a nice guy!Now we had been going for bout 2 weeks, and he decided to give me call me ( We insisted ourselves that we should get to know first via mails rather than indulging in phone conversation not knowing what to talk). He called, and i was kinda,err..shocked to hear his voice is more to girlish..?I mean more to a soft spoken side.But i didnt want this to bug me and continued our conversation, it went very well. I know ive a thing for guy'z voice(obviously not all the guys will have Clive Owen's voice lolz)

But pls be honest with me ladies am i overrreacting over these?I meant he's really a nice guy and i liked him so much, but at the same time i dont want this voice thing bug me....

 
Shooot. That would throw me off too. I think you'll get used to it though. I wouldn't dump him for it...especially if he is a great guy! Plus, he can't really help his voice.

 
I guess this is similar to that thread asking if you can fall for a guy that you didnt find physically attractive at first.

Since all you have going for you is the voice and e-mail conversations (have you at least seen a picture of him? Maybe the voice doesnt match the face - it could be nothing or it could be a red flag) then you really dont have much to judge from (especially since the physical presence is lacking).

I say give it time and if it still bugs you then and you cant picture yourself with someone with that voice - then move on.

And dont worry, its normal not shallow. We each have standards and as much as people say "looks dont matter" (in your case, voice)... they do - it is just that each person have different standards, but bottom line is we all have a standard. Just ask yourself - is he up to yours?

 
yea ive seen his pictures and his voice doesnt match at all..he's quite good looking and manly.That's what i was comparing that his voice and look are totally opposite?Lolz..

well, still early to judge that if he's compatible in everything, but to this point everything was going smooth..

 
Originally Posted by bronze_chiqz /img/forum/go_quote.gif (obviously not all the guys will have Clive Owen's voice lolz) HEY! Woman! Back off my second man! he is all mine. MINE!..

 
So u guys think that i should give it a try rather than thinking too much abt this pretty voice thingy?

I havent met him in person yet, i do believe a person's voice would be different when it comes face to face..Agree?
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Originally Posted by empericalbeauty /img/forum/go_quote.gif HEY! Woman! Back off my second man! he is all mine. MINE!.. Ahh...you too. I lust him so much.



I don't think you are over-reacting. Everyone else gave great advice. Just give it a go and maybe getting to know him better will will make it easier.

 
Originally Posted by KellyB /img/forum/go_quote.gif Ahh...you too. I lust him so much.



I don't think you are over-reacting. Everyone else gave great advice. Just give it a go and maybe getting to know him better will will make it easier.

*sigh* Mmmm...Clive Owen...I'm so going to watch that movie Elizabeth because of him. lol
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I do remember a few yrs back I was talking to this guy online via messenger for the past 2 wks and then he decides to give me a call. This guy is in his 30's, good looking, works out (think John Cena) and he has the cutest siberian husky known to man. lol, so then he finally gives me a call...and I'm utterly speechless with his voice. Instead of the guy I see in these pics he shows me, he sounds like a 13 yr old who hasn't gone through puberty yet...Nevertheless I was a bit disappointed. I mean, I couldn't even contain my giggles when he asked "let's have a picnic together and I'll bring the strawberries n whip cream" lol, instead of his comment having any sexual connotation to it...he just sounded like a HS kid trying to get "laid" lol.

it just didn't work out...I mean, it's only the internet and It might've been different if I actually saw him in person, but the voice did bother me a bit.

I'm not sure if it's just me being shallow...but I believe everyone has their preferences. I just prefer guys taller than me since I'm 5'8 and the deeper voice would help too. My voice is quite deep (think Cher and Toni Braxton) However, I'm willing to overlook someone who isn't quite attractive due to the fact he probably has the best personality out there. I feel that everyone is entitled to get a chance and prove their worth. Who knows, maybe in the long run it might work out well for you with the guy. Don't give up just yet!
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Give him a chance and don't make any judgments until you talk to him in person. Maybe it's the phone line. If so, perhaps your voice sounds odd to him. He could be a great guy and a potential soul mate - one never knows.

 
yea he would be coming down to visit me in mid November.Thanxx ladies, i feel much better after hearing all your suggestions.Will definitely update once i met him!Hopefully its all for good
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pray for me ladies
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Love u'all here!!

Blueangel- Like you, ive a thing for taller guys as well, well he should be at least taller than me (i'm 5'6). Most of the guys ive dated were either same tall as me or a bit shorter.This current ladd im dating is is 6'2 ..dats another reason i was after him as well
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Give him a chance. Would u want a super sweet, super nice guy with an off voice OR a total d*ckhead who sounds like Vin Diesel? Give it some time, you won't notice it after a while.

 
I read the comment above "its only the Internet" but there is a real person on the other end of the IM conversation or line. I think he deserves a chance if he seems compatible in every other way, once you have met him you will know if you click or not.

 
No one is perfect (present company excluded, of course). See him in person, maybe his voice will sound different. Maybe he will be so great in other ways that you can and will overlook the voice.

 
I don't think you're overreacting too much but since you do like him alot, I wouldn't stop talking to him because of it.

 
when i first heard my fiance's accent, it was such a turn-off! i loved him in emails and IMs, but when he called me for the first time, i was sooo taken aback, but now, i LOVE his accent cuz i love HIM. give it a chance
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Hahaha... That's so funny. I would be the same way. Give him a chance. If he is a nice guy I'm sure his voice will be overlooked. Dr. Drew, the sexpert, says..

"In my experience in answering questions, I've found it very common for women who use infantile voices to have had some significant trauma. This is an association I have observed over and over again. The trauma keeps that person stuck in a certain stage of development, and for some reason it often gets expressed in vocal quality."

...Maybe its the same for men.

 
Also I notice voices sound different on the phone and in real life

 
Originally Posted by Ricci /img/forum/go_quote.gif Also I notice voices sound different on the phone and in real life That's true too.
 
when i was younger.. when i used to date.. i would dump a guy if his hair ine was a touch out of place lol.. i was a i*****.. but going through them all i fond lucky number what ever he is lol

 

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