Hypothetical Situation of the Day - September 3rd

[SqueeKee]

You're currently living in a town with your husband/wife/significant other.

You both make the decision to move to another town/city/province/state/country, closer to his parents.

While you get on your feet, you are hoping to stay with your in laws, only your in laws say that your husband can stay, but you have to find another place to stay.

What do you do?

Note* Unlike the other hypothetical situations I've posted, I'm actually going through this situation right now, so I'm extra interested in your responses.

 

[AngelaGM]

I am assuming your MIL and FIL do not like you? Well that is THEIR problem and I don't think you both need to stay with them.

Also their response would really hurt my feelings.

 

[SqueeKee]

Originally Posted by AngelaGM /img/forum/go_quote.gif I am assuming your MIL and FIL do not like you? Well that is THEIR problem and I don't think you both need to stay with them. That's the thing Angela . . . aparently they don't have a problem with me at all? My mother in law had some problems in the past when Wes and I first got married, we even went without speaking for over a year. But a year and a half ago, her mother died and we started speaking again and grew very close. I thought things were fine between us . . . this is why I'm so confused.
I feel like it's very insulting, personally.

 

[AngelaGM]

That is extremely insulting! I used to date a man whose mother HATED me. She even told me that I was not invited to go to the Jersey Shore with them.

 

[SqueeKee]

Wow, that's sucks.

But I'm so confused because Wes's mom has been fine with me since her mom died. They only have a 2 bedroom apartment, a room for their other son and one for them, but if they have room for Wes, how much more room do they need to have me as well? I sleep *with him*.

Where I come from, Newfoundland, a person rather die than do something like that. We're very generous and hospitable people.

I'm wondering if they just don't know that this makes them look very bad and comes off as an insult? My father in law is very sweet and it's not like him to say I can't stay there out of meanness.

 

[AngelaGM]

I am thinking maybe you could get Wes to ask them as to why they do not want you to stay there? BTW the other reason my ex's mother HATED me was that she thought I had a crush on her husband. LOL!

 

[SqueeKee]

Oh wow, that's crazy Angela! That woman has problems!

Okay, well, I spoke to my husband about this but he doesn't want to approach them about it because they've helped us out in so many other ways and he doesn't want them to think we're being ungrateful.

 

[AngelaGM]

You could try to invite your MIL out to lunch or whatever to discuss this situation?

 

[SqueeKee]

I'm going to see how it turns out when we get there. I asked my birth mother if I can stay with her in the meantime.

 

[AngelaGM]

I will be thinking about you! Please feel free to IM me anytime if you need to talk or vent! I am going to start getting ready for work soon=)

 

[JennyMcL]

I think that's a real crock. That is beyond insulting and I can't believe they could even say such a thing? If that happenned to me I don't think I'd be spending a lot of time with my in-laws.

About New Foundland--I am a huge Great Big Sea fan and I have an online friend from there as well so I'm naturally predisposed to like the place. She's got me convinced I need to go to George Street and soon.

 

[SqueeKee]

I think I'm just going to try to stay positive and let them make themselves look like fools if they want!

Originally Posted by JennyMcL /img/forum/go_quote.gif About New Foundland--I am a huge Great Big Sea fan and I have an online friend from there as well so I'm naturally predisposed to like the place. She's got me convinced I need to go to George Street and soon. Woo for GBS

 

[Barbara Talbot]

I'd say get another husband or a new set of in-laws!

 

[dentaldee]

a husband and a wife should be considered as one.........I think it is morally wrong on your MIL's part and also wrong for Wes to take them up on the offer. I don't think your relationship with your inlaws is what you think it is. I hope you guys can figure something out!!

 

[Saja]

Well clearly your MIL doesnt have her head screwed on straight. And your right, that kinda shit doesnt fly around here.....whats mine is yours and everyone is family!!! Thats what i think you should move to Halifax!!!

 

[vickih]

just curious but what does your husband say about this?

 

[Aquilah]

How odd I'm just now coming into this post, and we're actually talking about it Kee! So, I reckon you know my opinion

 

[BeneBaby]

Husband and Wife are one unit...Period. How would MIL feel if FIL was aked to stay somewhere without her. You need to approach them in a calm way and ask them why. I think not facing the issue is a breeding ground for problems in the future. As long as you are nonthreatening they should have no issue.

 

[StereoXGirl]

Wow. It's definitely not right of your MIL to invite your husband to stay with them and not you! That's so rude!

I definitely think you and your hubby should ask about that. And if she doesn't invite you to stay, I think you and your husband should stay somewhere else (together).

 

[bella1342]

You and wes are one, like the others said, but I want to add that you are your inlaws DAUGHTER-in-law, and when you married wes you became their daughter. Really! To me that means they have an extra daughter or the daughter they never had. So you should be loved and treated like they would their own children. This is extremely insulting to me... I mean what do they expect you to do if you have nowhere else to go? live on the streets? if we were in this situation billy would never even attempt to stay at his parents house if I weren't invited. i don't understand what your inlaws are thinking. Is it possible you both can stay with your birth mother? I hope everything works out for you dear!