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What is the worst makeup advice you have ever received/heard of?

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Wait, what would even be the point of putting eyeliner in your eyes? Unless you were trying to achieve the tattooed eye-white look without the pain, but I think that particular beauty ideal is beyond most people's aesthetic.

 

I'm seriously baffled! :rotfl:

I think it may have had something to do with it melting down onto the waterline? I was scared for her!

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When I was considerably younger and venturing into higher-class department stores for the first time, I must have had something in me that screamed "Small-town country chick fresh out of Catholic school." The Clinique rep at the now-defunct Sibley's (became Kaufmann's, then Macy's) swooped down upon me like a vulture and bullied my 18-year-old self into buying a screaming-orange blush, quite possibly the last one in the store; I imagine the reps had a quiet bet amongst themselves as to who could get the ugly thing out of there, with a steak dinner at a far better place than Ponderosa riding upon it. It wasn't one of those pretty, pinky-coral shades like Nars Orgasm, that everyone could wear; it was almost Men-At-Work orange; after 30 years I don't remember the name, and I don't want to. It was a hideous tangerine color that made the BOGO rack at Claire's Boutique look like a valid option. The rep insisted with the thumping assurance of an evangelist that my light, ruddy, cool-based punim would look good with swirls of garish orange evil streaked across it; surely I had seen the Top Models of the day (1985) wearing such a shade, and it would SOOOOOOO bring out my cheekbones! I think I hastened my mother just a little closer to her grave the day I took it home. Thus began my decades-long aversion to orange makeup.

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I have hazel green eyes, and medium to dark brown hair and brows that has enough natural highlights that it can look vaguely reddish in the sun, brown in person, and dark brown/almost black in pictures.  As far as skin tone goes, I really need to get color matched because it's been hard to find something that works perfectly.  I am your typical Caucasian "mutt", but I think the little Native American ancestry I have is just dominant enough to mess with my undertones (I'm guessing, anyway).  The light stuff is too pink and the dark stuff is too orange.  

 

I've been told in the past that the "rules" for me are as follows:

 

-Get the lightest foundation you can find and use a powder 2 shades light to color correct

-Medium dark muted rose colored blush only.  Anything else will look garish and bizarre

-Light gray or dusty pastel shadows only

-Brown liner and mascara.  Under no circumstances use black.

-Any lip color darker than a neutral or light pink would be much too harsh with my skintone and hair color

 

 

You know what looks best on me?  

 

-Foundation that actually matches my skin (the best I can do right now)

-Blush in corals or blue based pinks

-I've rocked every shadow color, except bright blues and reds

-Black mascara and liner, thank you very much.  Although colored liner works.

-My go-to lip color is anything in a medium to darker berry shade.  And while my skintone might be pale, my lips aren't and that makes it really hard to find a neutral/"my lips but better" shade, so if I need to have a conservative lip, I take my lightest berry and sheer it within an inch of its like by blotting and using a gloss.  

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I hate in youtube videos when they do a gorgeous, dramatic cateye and say "just make a triangle." NO! Imitating it makes you look crazy if you have a different eye shape. I couldn't figure out why mine was so horrible.. then I learned about eye shape and not going over where my eye creases (that was bending it out of shape). I was new to makeup so that just wasn't something I was aware of.

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I am a cool-toned person. I have known this since I was like 12 and first discovered undertones were a thing (thank you Allure). When I was 14 I went to a fair thingy and revlon had a booth where you could try new lipstick they had. The "make up artist" working INSISTED I was warm toned and refused to put any color other than orangey red on me because "you don't understand. This will look so much better on you than pink."

 

Orangey red made me look dead and splotchy at 14. It still makes me look dead and splotchy at 31. I'm assuming she thought I was "warm" because my hair was red-ish at the time. No honey. I was a 14 year old who clearly went overboard on the sun-in and had extremely unflattering hair color. You should know better.

 

That still makes me mad to this day lol. Like damn man I'm asking for pink lipstick, not gold! Just give it to me!

Edited by bsquared
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I am a cool-toned person. I have known this since I was like 12 and first discovered undertones were a thing (thank you Allure). When I was 14 I went to a fair thingy and revlon had a booth where you could try new lipstick they had. The "make up artist" working INSISTED I was warm toned and refused to put any color other than orangey red on me because "you don't understand. This will look so much better on you than pink."

 

Orangey red made me look dead and splotchy at 14. It still makes me look dead and splotchy at 31. I'm assuming she thought I was "warm" because my hair was red-ish at the time. No honey. I was a 14 year old who clearly went overboard on the sun-in and had extremely unflattering hair color. You should know better.

 

That still makes me mad to this day lol. Like damn man I'm asking for pink lipstick, not gold! Just give it to me!

 

Oh my god that would make me so mad! Stories about this make me afraid to ever go to a makeup counter because aside from a few glorious exceptions, they always veer toward warm tones when they do makeup on themselves even if it doesn't look good. Why do cool tones get overlooked or even frowned upon so often??

Edited by Lrking1999
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The worst advice? The first time I was ever matched for foundation, it was MAC Matchmaster in 2.5 or something like that. I wore it consistently for the longest time only to realize one day that I was doing something seriously wrong to myself and every foundation I bought since being matched was just wayyy wrong. 
But, sales associates always insist I'm this or that. But NO! I'm not cool-toned. I'm not warm-toned. I'm not even neutral. I AM PALE BUT LIKE A YELLOW PALE. I feel like an alien when trying to get a foundation. I thank the heavens that I can get by wearing Chanel foundations in Beige 10 (when the counter lady tried to match me at Beige Rose 20 and the powder at natural 30.... <_< ) Some 'warm' foundations work for me when are more yellow based. But most just look too orange or dark even if it's supposed to be a lighter warm. 

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"Seasons." In the mid 1980's there was a book called "Color Me Beautiful" and it was full of some of the worst makeup and wardrobe advice that I can remember. It grouped people into "seasons" based on your coloring--warm-toned people into Spring and Autumn, cool into Summer and Winter. Based on my hair and eyes (light brown hair with reddish highlights, pale green eyes) I was automatically lumped into Autumn and advised to keep my wardrobe full of orange-based tones...and dear Lord, the makeup. There was actually a Color Me Beautiful makeup line that languished in mid-range department stores (long before Sephora was a Thing at Penney's they had a real makeup counter, where Color Me Beautiful gathered dust) and the clerks there were so desperate to move it out they nearly bullied you worse than a kid in the schoolyard shaking you down for lunch money. They could not move that stuff out, because everyone who stayed away from the self-help book rack knew that the seasons thing was marketing horse manure. The makeup made me look like a pumpkin, and being a fat chick did not help with that unflattering comparison. It took a sympathetic Prescriptives rep to help me figure out that I was actually cool-toned, and I threw out that damned book and started wearing pink and purple again.

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(long before Sephora was a Thing at Penney's they had a real makeup counter, where Color Me Beautiful gathered dust)

My first makeup fetish was the Stagelight Cosmetics counter at my local JC Penney -- I remember the beauty department!

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The only bad advice I've gotten was both (separate occasions and stores) at Sephora, with a sales lady trying to sell me a foundation that was A) Too dark (a common thing to happen, I'm very very pale) and B)It also had this very pbvious yellow undertone going on...I'm not a yellow undertone, ever. "Just blend it down your neck, and it will look great! I just know this foundation will work for you!!!" Yeah, no, no it won't.

And the other time was a saleslady INSISTING that a very, VERY dark orange bronzer was "the perfect contour shade" for me. HA. Ha. ha. No. I prefer not looking like an oompa loompa, thanks.

 

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oh also, I remember my old friend saying to me, you look fine, trust me... I look in the mirror and see I look like I got punched in the face with eyeliner and green/grey/blue eyeshadow... ummm, eww.

 

never trust people doing your maleup if they say trust you. :wub:-_-

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My first makeup fetish was the Stagelight Cosmetics counter at my local JC Penney -- I remember the beauty department!

I grew up in a very small hick town and the nearest makeup that wasn't Maybelline and Hazel Bishop lipstick was nearly a half-hour drive away, a mall with a Penney's and a very fine makeup counter, including Bonne Bell (before it was marketed to the same demographic as Nickelodeon.) They made Lipsmackers back then that were just colossal, like an inch wide by almost four inches long, suspended from braided neck cords. Where I grew up, they were considered status symbols. I went to the tiny parochial school in town, and we wore a uniform; the Lipsmackers were the only bit of color allowed (the nuns reluctantly let the girls have them, because of the risks of chapped lips during a Buffalo winter where we were still herded outside for recess even in bitter weather.) Even more than that, however: they were proof that we were able to get out of town on occasion. When I was able to buy my first Bonne Bell palette, I guarded that thing like the crown jewels!

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I grew up in a very small hick town and the nearest makeup that wasn't Maybelline and Hazel Bishop lipstick was nearly a half-hour drive away, a mall with a Penney's and a very fine makeup counter, including Bonne Bell (before it was marketed to the same demographic as Nickelodeon.) They made Lipsmackers back then that were just colossal, like an inch wide by almost four inches long, suspended from braided neck cords. Where I grew up, they were considered status symbols. I went to the tiny parochial school in town, and we wore a uniform; the Lipsmackers were the only bit of color allowed (the nuns reluctantly let the girls have them, because of the risks of chapped lips during a Buffalo winter where we were still herded outside for recess even in bitter weather.) Even more than that, however: they were proof that we were able to get out of town on occasion. When I was able to buy my first Bonne Bell palette, I guarded that thing like the crown jewels!

 

Oh God, the maglight-sized Lip Smackers! I remember those! 

 

Of course, I also had my second-worst foundation experience in Penney's (the worst is earlier in this thread). I was at... I want to say the Clinique counter, pretty sure that's what it was. They had a color corrector paste-in-a-compact. Since I'm very warm/yellow toned, they recommended the lavender one. I asked how to wear it. She told me tp just use the sponge and apply it all over, then powder over it.

 

Well, that was not one of my better looks, let's just say. I am so foundation-challenged.

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@@gingerneko Stagelight! omg I was addicted to those sparkly pigments, my favorite was a purple pigment that was just drop dead gorgeous.

Stagelight also had the first palette I ever lusted after -- looked exactly like a watercolor palette, bright yellow metal, with all sorts of gorgeous bright shadows. Back then, $20 was a lot for makeup, so I never bought it.

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Um ... well, once a lady at Shoppers (she didn't work there, just chatting while shopping) insisted to me that she swore by applying kohl eyeliner /directly to her eyeballs/ rather than just the waterline. I just made a dying sound before telling her that wasn't a good idea, and she said that "as long as it doesn't have glitter in it, it's fine! Glitter isn't eyesafe."

 

Lady ... how are you not blind...?

I legit LOL'd! Too funny!

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When I was considerably younger and venturing into higher-class department stores for the first time, I must have had something in me that screamed "Small-town country chick fresh out of Catholic school." The Clinique rep at the now-defunct Sibley's (became Kaufmann's, then Macy's) swooped down upon me like a vulture and bullied my 18-year-old self into buying a screaming-orange blush, quite possibly the last one in the store; I imagine the reps had a quiet bet amongst themselves as to who could get the ugly thing out of there, with a steak dinner at a far better place than Ponderosa riding upon it. It wasn't one of those pretty, pinky-coral shades like Nars Orgasm, that everyone could wear; it was almost Men-At-Work orange; after 30 years I don't remember the name, and I don't want to. It was a hideous tangerine color that made the BOGO rack at Claire's Boutique look like a valid option. The rep insisted with the thumping assurance of an evangelist that my light, ruddy, cool-based punim would look good with swirls of garish orange evil streaked across it; surely I had seen the Top Models of the day (1985) wearing such a shade, and it would SOOOOOOO bring out my cheekbones! I think I hastened my mother just a little closer to her grave the day I took it home. Thus began my decades-long aversion to orange makeup.

OMG this was hilarious!!! Especially the part "with the thumping assurance of an evangelist..." I'm tickled pink!

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Awesome thread! I wish I had something to contribute but at the moment I cant think of any horrible advice I've received.

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I legit learned most of my makeup techniques from watching drag queens (Hello Willam Belli!) so I am sure I picked up horrible advice along the way, but still go with it. I do tone it down a lot to a more wearable look, but I am sure people look at me and wonder where I went wrong....I am rocking a red eyeshadow today. Just sayin'.

 

Moral of this post: Don't take makeup advice from me, or it'll end up in this thread!

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also, "try some pink nail polish on your eyelashes, it really works"  <_<:angry:

Oh my god. WORST. ADVICE. EVER. OH my heart just breaks to think of someone doing this. Did you try it?

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not sure if this qualifies for "worst" advice, but... back in April in local Sephora I got matched to Color IQ a shade or to lighter then I need. At the time I did have some reservations about the shade, but the store associate assured me that it looks great... So, for a month or so I walked around with unnaturally light skin tone and wondered why I look so odd in the pictures. I don't really wear foundation every day, so that made it even harder to catch. Bottom line: trust your eyes (and your instincts), not store associates and their fancy technology.

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Two words: Glitter EVERYWHERE. Why oh why did I listen to Seventeen magazine back in the 90's? I looked like a disco ball for waaaaaay to long.

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I remember one of the girls that went to High School with me who asked me why I don't wear my foundation a shade darker than my actual skintone so I look tanner......... yeah no thx.

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Oh the Seasonal book!  I'm an "Autumn" too, and while I was smart enough to avoid the orange makeup, I thought I could *only* wear warm colors and avoided anything cool like silver, pink or lavender.  Silly me, I look awesome in lavender!

 

I also, not on anyone's advice, but just by being young and poor, bought horrible quality makeup for years and years.  I couldn't figure out why everyone else didn't have eyeliner and mascara smeared under their eyes by the end of the day, or how their skin didn't start getting shiny after a few hours.   No lie, it was actually finding THIS site that helped me figure out all my makeup issues.  Two years later and I've found eyeliner that doesn't move, and powder that actually mattifies, and all the pretty shiny eyeshadow colors!

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Oh the Seasonal book!  I'm an "Autumn" too, and while I was smart enough to avoid the orange makeup, I thought I could *only* wear warm colors and avoided anything cool like silver, pink or lavender.  Silly me, I look awesome in lavender!

 

I also, not on anyone's advice, but just by being young and poor, bought horrible quality makeup for years and years.  I couldn't figure out why everyone else didn't have eyeliner and mascara smeared under their eyes by the end of the day, or how their skin didn't start getting shiny after a few hours.   No lie, it was actually finding THIS site that helped me figure out all my makeup issues.  Two years later and I've found eyeliner that doesn't move, and powder that actually mattifies, and all the pretty shiny eyeshadow colors!

Your post made me sit back for a few minutes reflecting about my make-up journey... That's really cool and inspirational what you wrote...

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