27 ways to know if you've found the right relationship for you

[pinksugar]

I really like all those questions! it made me feel good to know that I knew the answers in all my relationships, for better or worse.

The only thing is... that how you treat your mother/father reflects on how you will treat your future mate. To an outside observer, it may not be obvious how much I love my father, because my relationship with my mum is overwhelmingly close. I adore my dad, but sometimes I feel bad because I just don't have the closeness I have with my mum.

The kind of relationship I have always been at pains to build with prospective partners would/has contained the same depth of love I have for my dad - but for me, communication is very important, and I just don't communicate directly with my dad - usually if it is something really important, I tell mum and she will tell him, and vice versa, despite the fact we get on really really well - if it is something we feel emotional about (for example, if he is not happy with my bf sleeping in my double bed) then he will complain to mum, who will explain how he feels. Then I would tell mum how I feel and she would pass on the result to him, or explain my point of view.

when I think about it, it's really bizare, and it certainly isn't something I would want to replicate in any of my sexual relationships

 

[James]

Quote:
I also think you can tell a great deal about your new mate by the way he treats his mother and how she treats her father. Observing how a person regards that parent is key in establishing how he or she will treat you! Ahh, I hate it when people or articles say this. My boyfriend hasn't talked to his mother in four years and has never once had anything good to say about her. But he has never been anything less than respectful, and sweet, and caring to me. A bad relationship with one person doesn't dictate every future relationship that person has. If someone's terrible to their exes, or treats the people around them badly, like their friends or even waiters, then I have a whole lot less respect for them than if they have issues with a not necessarily good relationship that they've put up with for their entire lives.

 

[shaikhaf]

awesome post, lisa!

 

[enyadoresme]

wow this is stuff i never would have considered

 

[FoxyMelly]

Awesome post !! You sure made me think about a couple things hehe.

Except i agree with James about the whole mother situation. My boyfriend is muslim which therefore means he can not be with me (a white girl). Him and his mom have never gotten along and she was really strict about his religion..and it eventually lead to some crazy obstacles but we overcame them. We now live together and his mother has disowned him and he doesnt ever want to talk to her again. SO my POINT being that.. i dont think it matters all thaty much about his relationship with his mom, i mean NOBODY has ever been so kind, caring and nurturing to my needs before and I plan to marry him. So i totally agree with James lol

 

[pinksugar]

that's awesome foxy, that he would do that not only for you, but also for himself

it's really nice when people realise for themselves that a relationship is toxic and do something about it rather than whinge and moan but continue to put up with it.. your story made me smile !

 

[FoxyMelly]

Awwwww im glad you liked it hehe. Ya it was definetly a hard time for both of us, his mom wanted an arranged marriage for him and well pretty much wud rather see her son unhappy than with me. But yes, he left his whole family behind for me and im so proud of him lol. He pretty much calls my mom "Mom" so it works out juuusttt right

 

[pinksugar]

awww.. that's cute! I love happy endings

 

[jakk-attakk]

thats really interesting. i guess you shouldnt throw all of those wquestions at him on the first date though right? lol x

 

[zeze]

thanks

 

[Asimina]

Thanks!!! Nice Posting