Funny Shit By Somebody You All Should Know

Makeuptalk.com - Makeup forums and reviews

Help Support Makeuptalk.com - Makeup forums and reviews:

Tim

Joined
Feb 19, 2004
Messages
200
Reaction score
0
If you dont know george carlin we have to talk. I will send you some of his mp3s from his stuff lol.

Quote:
COWSIs it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can

track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where

she sleeps in the state of Washington, and they tracked her calves to

their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens

wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow.

CONSTITUTION

They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don't we

just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it's

worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore.

TEN COMMANDMENTS

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse.

You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery"

and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and

politicians.... It creates a hostile work environment.

And last, but not least.....

George Carlin said it best about Martha Stewart "Boy, I feel a lot safer

now that she's behind bars. O. J. Simpson, Michael Jackson, Robert Blake,

and Kobe Bryant are still walking

around; Osama Bin Laden too; but they take the one woman in America willing

to cook, clean, and work in the yard, and haul her ass off to jail

 

Tim

Joined
Feb 19, 2004
Messages
200
Reaction score
0
Maybe I will up some of his files later


I have 2.2 gigs in mp3s of his stuff.

Listening to seven dirty words right now. lol

 
Joined
Jan 8, 2006
Messages
297
Reaction score
0
That was a good one and just so true..............all the people who really did a MAJOR crime are just walking the streets with freedom..........but the one woman who helps people with their everyday life problems goes to jail. Now is that fair.............nope.............not at all. Where is the justice when it's needed?
 
Joined
May 28, 2004
Messages
1,649
Reaction score
0
Carlin is truly a comedy icon. His work continues to be fresh and hilarious even after 40 years in the business.

My most quoted Carlin-ism: "F*cking MEOW, MAN!"

I also loved his bit part in Dogma! Buddy Christ...too funny!

Cardinal Glick: Fill them pews, people, that's the key. Grab the little ones as well. Hook 'em while they're young.

Rufus: Kind of like the tobacco industry?

Cardinal Glick: Christ, if only we had their numbers.
 

Latest posts

Top