Let him know how much you love him and tell him you want to marry him one day!
I totally agree. You can be engaged, but have a long engagement. Wait until you are 26-27 to get married.Y'all have definitely been together a long time, no doubt, but you also seem young (hopefully this isn't creepy i just noticed your profile said you're a freshman in college). My unsolicited advice, even if you got engaged within the next year or so would be to wait a few more years to get married. I hated hearing that when I was in undergrad. But my boyfriend and I dated pretty much all through undergrad + this first year of law school I am about to finish before he propsed. Looking back on the last three years, and everything we went through, we have both changed A LOT (in good ways). Basically my point is everyone goes through changes/growing up in undergrad, some for better and some for worse. And right now it seems like you need to work on communication with him and your parents before marriage comes.
Me. We were living together for that long also. I just turned 34, DH will be 35 next month, and our 1st wedding anniversary is in September though we have been a couple since Jan '03. (No human kids.)I know couples who dated for 10 years before they got married.
I really think that it is completely his own choice if or when he wants to propose to marry you.It's not like he doesn't want to propose and I'm forcing him to, but he has said many times that he would "engage me", as he calls it, in a heartbeat but he knows I keep our relationship pretty personal and that I would try to keep it a secret from my parents. I guess it hurts his feelings that I wouldn't just come out and tell them. I also don't say I love you to him in front of my parents. I'm just not a very openly affectionate person toward anyone except him, and I think it hurts his feelings. So how can I drop the hint that I WANT him to propose to me?
We have been dating for 5 years, by the way, if that matters. So it isn't like we are going into it too fast or it scares him or anything.
Thanks in advance, and God bless you! ( :
He doesn't want to propose to you. He is not sure he wants to marry you. You don't need to drop hints to anyone they usually can tell you want to marry them. I don't think he feels the same way. You need to find out why.It's not like he doesn't want to propose and I'm forcing him to, but he has said many times that he would "engage me", as he calls it, in a heartbeat but he knows I keep our relationship pretty personal and that I would try to keep it a secret from my parents. I guess it hurts his feelings that I wouldn't just come out and tell them. I also don't say I love you to him in front of my parents. I'm just not a very openly affectionate person toward anyone except him, and I think it hurts his feelings. So how can I drop the hint that I WANT him to propose to me?
We have been dating for 5 years, by the way, if that matters. So it isn't like we are going into it too fast or it scares him or anything.
Thanks in advance, and God bless you! ( :
My husband and I dated for 7 years before we got married, and 5 of those were long distance. We definitely felt like we were too young and needed to at least finish college first. Neither of us wanted to be dependent on our parents or take any loans that would be difficult to pay off, so we waited until we could be more stable financially /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />Yes, one year is nothing. I think when I was younger I wanted to get married young, and was swept away by the romanticism of it. But I'm 25 now, I'll be dating my boyfriend for 5 years as of September this year, and we've definitely committed to each other, but even after 5 years we're not ready for marriage. We don't have the finances to do so, and I think we still think of ourselves as too young. We've lived together and we can tell we'd be a good team when we do eventually get married, but we're just not in a rush to do so. I know couples who dated for 10 years before they got married.
But the key word you used is " push " you shouldnt have to push anyone into a big decision like marriage.Relationships just dont work that way you have to compromise and be patient and wait for things unfortunately things dont always go your way you dont always get what you want when you want it.Its not always about you when your in a relationship you have to think about the other person and what they need as well.Giving him an ultimatum or having his friends say something to him is going to make him uncomfortable about the situation.Try and look at it from the other persons perspective.I'm nontraditional and blunt in relationships. I can't imagine being surprised by a bf's proposal.
Your friends can help with pushing your boyfriend's cold feet. You can mention the average length people wait to marry, the benefits, slowly begin adding wedding culture to your conversation and descriptions, maybe pictures of white dresses. Haahha. Sneaky!
Long distance most people dont consider that being in a" real relationship" because you dont see the person on a daily basis or even a weekly or monthly basis you hardly ever see them and your forms of contact are texting or phone calls its not really the same as being in a relationship its more like online dating to me so in terms of relationship years you dont really know someone that well dating from a distance so I wouldnt even count that as part of the number of years personally.Actual dating is much more intimate I dont mean on a sexual level but in an intimate personal face to face level where you really get to know someone.My husband and I dated for 7 years before we got married, and 5 of those were long distance. We definitely felt like we were too young and needed to at least finish college first. Neither of us wanted to be dependent on our parents or take any loans that would be difficult to pay off, so we waited until we could be more stable financially /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />
My husband (married 3 1/2 years) travels about 75% of the time for work, sometimes away for weeks/months at a time. It doesn't make our relationship or marriage any less "real." Should I subtract the time he's away when people ask how long we've been married? That's absurd.Long distance most people dont consider that being in a" real relationship" because you dont see the person on a daily basis or even a weekly or monthly basis you hardly ever see them and your forms of contact are texting or phone calls its not really the same as being in a relationship its more like online dating to me so in terms of relationship years you dont really know someone that well dating from a distance so I wouldnt even count that as part of the number of years personally.
Well when you married him my guess is you knew he wouldnt be around much am I right ? Its the same if your husbands a doctor you know he wont be spending too much time at home with you or your kids but again thats something a woman would know before marrying someone like that where the mans job is such where he wouldnt be at home that much.Things like that you would know before marrying the guy what type of job he has / career.Not many women would be okay with it but if you are do you.My husband (married 3 1/2 years) travels about 75% of the time for work, sometimes away for weeks/months at a time. It doesn't make our relationship or marriage any less "real." Should I subtract the time he's away when people ask how long we've been married? That's absurd.
The bottom line is that each couple's reality is very different, and we shouldn't apply our own experiences to other people's relationships. I know that not everyone would be comfortable with a spouse working like mine does, but it works for us and our relationship, if anything, has strengthened. The same goes for relationship length - one couple might achieve a level of intimacy at 1 year that takes another couple 5. Only two people can ever really know what's happening in a relationship and what works/what doesn't.
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