slinka
The Supreme
So, when it rains, it pours in slinka-land.
So, we went through the minor-ish crisis of our fridge/freezer quitting, losing a bunch of food, and having to bite the bullet and buy a new one (the cost to repair one part on an almost 15 yr old fridge was over half the cost of a new one...). So, such is life, right? We'll just live on rice and beans to help cut costs and whatnot.
Well, the day after getting the new fridge (today) my husband finally went to the doctor, for a few things. He's had a reoccurring issue, but doctors pawned it off on other things (legit causes, which were treated and no big deal) and low and behold, he's still having this issue. So, finally the doctor says, "well, it could be and ulcer, or it can be cancer". But want do the procedure to figure out wtf it is for 2 weeks! I don't get why...seriously, I mean, I guess it's ONLY some silly 'ol cancer, how silly it is to want a diagnostic procedure done asap to figure out if my husband is dying slowly. No big deal amirite? (He's also getting a blood test done...tomorrow I think, for something unrelated but possibly serious, possibly nothing at all. I don't know why the dr wants to wait 2 weeks to do a test that requires no blood and is unrelated to the blood test.)
-_- /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />
Y'all know I don't deal well with this type of stuff.
I guess All can do is just...not think about it until we know for sure. I guess if he does have cancer, lets hope it's stage 1.
But I can't stop being pessimistic. Not just because its my nature, but Because its NEVER the better of two (or rather, four) evils in my life. It always goes from "everything's fine and dandy" to complete shit. I can't help but think the worst...I keep preparing myself to be a widow with 2 children at age 25. And f***, that just sounds....great. Add to that I'm stuck in a state with no real friends (well, I take that back, I made one, but we only see each other occasionally) and zero family- what family I have is just my brother and sister...I'm not exactly close to anyone else in my immediate family and don't care to be, for reasons. Everyone else here is merely awkwardly nice, and I'm pretty sure it's just because I'm some sort of prize to them and their church....like whoever can convert the weird tattooed lady gets into whatever the top tier in their afterlife is called or something. And yes, I have reason to believe that- it's obvious that they're just trying to get me to their church. And that's joust not gonna happen- no offense to anyone who holds a religion- more power to you! But in my state...(and I'm not in the capital, where the main religion here is *only *60% majority...) not being a part of their religion IS a big deal....more than someone not in this position would realize. Even the news, like Fox News, reports on what the church has to say about things....it's bizarre).
So there's my rant. I'll update as (for my sanity...who else am I gonna talk to?) soon as we learn anything. I just really wish I didn't have to wait 2 weeks to see what is going on with the husband. If it IS the cancer, I feel like its probably be stage 2 if we're lucky, just because symptoms don't like to occur very much in stage one- but he is sort of young-ish to have this type of cancer....usually men don't start screening (and he has no family history to justify earlier screening) for another 5 years... So, it's kinda close, but still a little young to get like, full blown stage 4 deathcancer, I figure.
But once again...with my luck in life....
*sigh*
Here's hoping he's not dying.
P.S.- I hope this doesn't come across as a selfish...or ...idk, self-absorbed post. My husband is the opposite of me in that he's optimistic, and he's likely not going to worry at all until he finds out it's something worth worrying about. Of course I'm here to support him- its about him, I know this. I just needed to vent my feelings, because I'm wayyyy more emotional, and way more emotional then I'll let on in real life. So, please, don't think of me in a negative light for expressing myself- I am indeed supporting him
/emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />
So, we went through the minor-ish crisis of our fridge/freezer quitting, losing a bunch of food, and having to bite the bullet and buy a new one (the cost to repair one part on an almost 15 yr old fridge was over half the cost of a new one...). So, such is life, right? We'll just live on rice and beans to help cut costs and whatnot.
Well, the day after getting the new fridge (today) my husband finally went to the doctor, for a few things. He's had a reoccurring issue, but doctors pawned it off on other things (legit causes, which were treated and no big deal) and low and behold, he's still having this issue. So, finally the doctor says, "well, it could be and ulcer, or it can be cancer". But want do the procedure to figure out wtf it is for 2 weeks! I don't get why...seriously, I mean, I guess it's ONLY some silly 'ol cancer, how silly it is to want a diagnostic procedure done asap to figure out if my husband is dying slowly. No big deal amirite? (He's also getting a blood test done...tomorrow I think, for something unrelated but possibly serious, possibly nothing at all. I don't know why the dr wants to wait 2 weeks to do a test that requires no blood and is unrelated to the blood test.)
-_- /emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />
Y'all know I don't deal well with this type of stuff.
I guess All can do is just...not think about it until we know for sure. I guess if he does have cancer, lets hope it's stage 1.
But I can't stop being pessimistic. Not just because its my nature, but Because its NEVER the better of two (or rather, four) evils in my life. It always goes from "everything's fine and dandy" to complete shit. I can't help but think the worst...I keep preparing myself to be a widow with 2 children at age 25. And f***, that just sounds....great. Add to that I'm stuck in a state with no real friends (well, I take that back, I made one, but we only see each other occasionally) and zero family- what family I have is just my brother and sister...I'm not exactly close to anyone else in my immediate family and don't care to be, for reasons. Everyone else here is merely awkwardly nice, and I'm pretty sure it's just because I'm some sort of prize to them and their church....like whoever can convert the weird tattooed lady gets into whatever the top tier in their afterlife is called or something. And yes, I have reason to believe that- it's obvious that they're just trying to get me to their church. And that's joust not gonna happen- no offense to anyone who holds a religion- more power to you! But in my state...(and I'm not in the capital, where the main religion here is *only *60% majority...) not being a part of their religion IS a big deal....more than someone not in this position would realize. Even the news, like Fox News, reports on what the church has to say about things....it's bizarre).
So there's my rant. I'll update as (for my sanity...who else am I gonna talk to?) soon as we learn anything. I just really wish I didn't have to wait 2 weeks to see what is going on with the husband. If it IS the cancer, I feel like its probably be stage 2 if we're lucky, just because symptoms don't like to occur very much in stage one- but he is sort of young-ish to have this type of cancer....usually men don't start screening (and he has no family history to justify earlier screening) for another 5 years... So, it's kinda close, but still a little young to get like, full blown stage 4 deathcancer, I figure.
But once again...with my luck in life....
*sigh*
Here's hoping he's not dying.
P.S.- I hope this doesn't come across as a selfish...or ...idk, self-absorbed post. My husband is the opposite of me in that he's optimistic, and he's likely not going to worry at all until he finds out it's something worth worrying about. Of course I'm here to support him- its about him, I know this. I just needed to vent my feelings, because I'm wayyyy more emotional, and way more emotional then I'll let on in real life. So, please, don't think of me in a negative light for expressing myself- I am indeed supporting him
/emoticons/[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" />
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