you are doing the right thing by being supportive and attentive. but you are right, you have a life too. you have other children, who you dont want to start doing poorly in school also, as a ploy for your attention. i was somewhat the same way when i was that age, actually basically all the way up until grade ten. my parents were both very supportive, helped with homework, made it very clear that getting good grades was something that was very important in household. but still, i basically had that attitude that, 'its my life, if i dont want to try at school, no one else is being affected but me. so leave me alone.' this made them very mad, and they did NOT see it that way, and in turn, pushed harder, made more rules about studying, and more consequences for poor grades or unfinished assignments. it was a vicious cycle, because the more they pushed, the more i rebelled. i wasnt a bad kid, i wasnt into anything i shouldnt be, i was just very independent, and if someone told me to do one thing, i did my very hardest to do the opposite.
when i got into about the middle of grade ten, my friends began talking about university, taking classes to fulfill the criteria, getting really good grades for thier passport to education (not sure if you have that in the US, but in canada throughout high school, if you get a certain GPA you get money towards post secondary school, in a little passport thing. every year its more and more). anyways, i started thinking about what i wanted to do, and knew i wanted to go to university, and i began to actually take school seriously. i knew that if i did poorly in school, i wouldnt be able to get into a good school, i would not be able to do the things i wanted to in life. so in turn, i went from being on the merrit list like twice, to honor role student every sememster. not because my parents did anything differently, but because for the first time, i was doing it for myself. it took me and ONLY me, to pull up my socks and get my crap togeather.
i am glad that i had parents that took an interest in my school, and supported me and pushed for me to do well, but really, at that age, in that young teen mindset, there was nothing anyone could say or do, that would have made it any different early on. so i would say that you are doing a great job, but your daughter is old enough to be doing things on her own, and nothing you can say will make her decide one day to put in her all. it will make you want to pull out your hair, but this is how it is. one day she will get it, but im sure then, she will be very grateful for you being there for her all along.
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[email protected] 2x" width="20" height="20" /> good luck! being a parent is the hardest job anyone will ever have to do! but if you are supportive and loving, there is nothing in the world you can do wrong.
