Birchbox April 2016 Spoilers

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I got one of my boxes yesterday! image.jpeg

The beaver shampoo and conditioner are pretty good sizes, but I'm trading them to someone who loves them.

I've already tried the bb cream in another box before, I think Allure (formally known as sample society) and I like it, so that's cool, but a new product to try would have been cooler.

The lip pencil is full size, so that's always great, but I haven't opened it yet.

The wipes were my sample choice but I don't dig them, well maybe they're just different than I expected. They smell SO good, like you could eat them, but I don't know if mine were "dried out" or if they are just like that, the package seems they suggest kind of warming them up since coconut oil gets solid in cooler temps. I wonder if that made my wipe stiff? 

I don't necessarily feel like these were superior at getting my make up off (compared to say my Yes to Coconut wipes) but they are good for leaving your face feeling nice an moisturized, almost to the point that I didn't feel like I need to add any moisturizer later on, but I like to take my make up off, apply treatments then follow up with moisturizer. I feel like the wipes left my face semi-coated with the oil and wouldn't allow my acne treatment to penetrate. 

I'm getting two more wipes in my second account, even though I picked the trio. So I might just swap them or give them to my sister to try.  

Those of you who go the wipes, what do you think of them? Am I being weird?

 
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Got my box today:

The Beaver shampoo and conditioner. I got the other S &C duo in this brand last year, and it's ok. I thought it was pretty comparable to Pantene products. But seriously, how ridiculous is this brand name? "Beaver" shampoo, really? Is that the best the marketing department could do? First of all, there's the unfortunate connotation that would have every 13 year snickering (and me, since I have around the same maturity level), but with that aside, what were they going for, with "Beaver?" The hard-working, industriousness we associated with beavers? I know beaver pelts were a thing once, and perhaps still are in some places, but I never thought of their hair as soft and silky. I know I'm way overthinking here, but this name choice has baffled me for a year now.

The Au Naturelle trio: the pans in this trio are super narrow. It makes the blush hard to use. The ivory eyeshadow didn't show up on my lids (until it creased within half an hour). I noticed the blush and eyeshadow have the exact same ingredients, so the shadow could be used as a highlighter, perhaps, if the sample palette was easier to use. The lipstick shade in Sangria (really the only reason I chose this as sample choice) is really pretty though, with decent color payoff.

The Accure scrub: it will eventually get used. Whatever.

The Penhaligon's Levantium fragrance: Oh my God. This is even more oppressively headache-inducing than Harvey Prince's "Sincerely." This is the review I left on birchbox (and I really hope they let it post):

"Remember that time your grandma spilled her entire whiskey sour on her polyester pantsuit, soaking all the loose honey-lemon throat lozenges and menthol cigarettes in the blazer pocket, and then you spent the whole 2 hour car trip back from your sister’s karate competition squished in the backseat next to grandma, trying not to gag from the cloying, vaguely medicinal musty stench? That’s exactly what this fragrance reminds me of, except it’s somehow even worse."

So....this was not my best month. I'm in a year sub through November, otherwise I would seriously think about taking a break from BB for awhile.

 
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Jay.Aitch.Gee said:
"Remember that time your grandma spilled her entire whiskey sour on her polyester pantsuit, soaking all the loose honey-lemon throat lozenges and menthol cigarettes in the blazer pocket, and then you spent the whole 2 hour car trip back from your sister’s karate competition squished in the backseat next to grandma, trying not to gag from the cloying, vaguely medicinal musty stench? That’s exactly what this fragrance reminds me of, except it’s somehow even worse."
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I hate perfume, and this really resonated with me. It's also hilarious. 

 
Jay.Aitch.Gee said:
(I just reread my previous post, and it sounds more Andy Rooney-esque than I meant it to. I'm disappointed in my samples this month, but I'm not as cranky as that post suggests. I'm kind of entertained by the suckiness of my box this month, actually.)
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It was hilarious. And Andy Rooney was kind of amazing
 
I got the curated and was excited about the coupon for rifle paper until I realized as of now, they don't have tumblers, tote bags or cell phone cases that will fit my phone.  It's good until December, so I can check back regularly. There isn't much chance of my tossing out the coupon because it's almost as cute as the box.  

As to Beaver shampoo, I researched this last year. I believe the Chinese company was trying to confuse people into thinking they were Green Beaver, an organic all-natural shampoo company in Canada.  It would be like selling hand cream and lip balms under the name Kurt's Wasps. Only someone who spoke English as a second or third language would see no problem with this name. 

 
Jay.Aitch.Gee said:
"Remember that time your grandma spilled her entire whiskey sour on her polyester pantsuit, soaking all the loose honey-lemon throat lozenges and menthol cigarettes in the blazer pocket, and then you spent the whole 2 hour car trip back from your sister’s karate competition squished in the backseat next to grandma, trying not to gag from the cloying, vaguely medicinal musty stench? That’s exactly what this fragrance reminds me of, except it’s somehow even worse."

So....this was not my best month. I'm in a year sub through November, otherwise I would seriously think about taking a break from BB for awhile.
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Please let this post to BB!

 
So, I got the Acure Pore Minimizing Scrub...except it's an empty, unsealed tub...there was never a product in this tube period.  

 
Hi, everyone. Usually just a lurker but I need to vent about that Au Natural sample. I didn't even pick it and I still got it and UGH. I've had the shadow on for maybe 35 min now and it creased basically immediately. And don't even get me started on the sample size/package combination. I could barely get the shadow on to a brush, so how would this even work for blush? I'm just annoyed and want to know whose half-baked idea this sample was.

 
basementsong said:
Hi, everyone. Usually just a lurker but I need to vent about that Au Natural sample. I didn't even pick it and I still got it and UGH. I've had the shadow on for maybe 35 min now and it creased basically immediately. And don't even get me started on the sample size/package combination. I could barely get the shadow on to a brush, so how would this even work for blush? I'm just annoyed and want to know whose half-baked idea this sample was.
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I"m getting my sample of this today, I just have to see this. People on Facebook said it's Barbie sized.

 
Bizgirlva said:
I"m getting my sample of this today, I just have to see this. People on Facebook said it's Barbie sized.
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I don't mind small samples like the Balm cosmetics, I think they're adorable but still usable. But the au naturale sample is tiny though in a nice compact, each pan is so narrow that you can't even get your finger in there to apply. Their full size items are nice. I got the rose gold highlighter in the LE box today and it has nice packaging and my hand is still glowing where I swatched it.

 
Noel S. said:
I got the curated and was excited about the coupon for rifle paper until I realized as of now, they don't have tumblers, tote bags or cell phone cases that will fit my phone.  It's good until December, so I can check back regularly. There isn't much chance of my tossing out the coupon because it's almost as cute as the box.  

As to Beaver shampoo, I researched this last year. I believe the Chinese company was trying to confuse people into thinking they were Green Beaver, an organic all-natural shampoo company in Canada.  It would be like selling hand cream and lip balms under the name Kurt's Wasps. Only someone who spoke English as a second or third language would see no problem with this name. 
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Ahhh, stuff from China.  One more reason I unsubbed in December and haven't been tempted to re-sub yet.  Mainly, I just didn't like the samples anymore, but it seemed like Birchbox was moving further away from cruelty-free ... not that they were ever cruelty-free to begin with ...

 
Hey y'all....so, speaking of healthy Andy Rooney-esque venting (btw, he was a WWII war correspondent as well as complainer in chief on 60 Minutes)....*cracks neck and knuckles*.....so.  I reserved the phone charger as my add on this month.  I've started traveling a lot for work and it would be perfect for me at the airport.  I saved my confirm email, which said I would get my add on with my box, and went on my merry way.  I come home from work one day and I find my April box shoved in my mailbox, no add on.  I email customer service, using my confirmation email as the base.  Ugh.  First I get a response asking me to forward my confirmation email.  "Um, how about you scroll down?" I scream in my head, but nicely tell the dummy pants cs rep that I used my confirm email as the base of my inquiry.  She responds that she reached out to the tech team and they said the charger was removed from my order and they're all sold out.....but! When it comes back in stock, I get to buy it at full price!  YAY!  I lost it.  I mean, yeah, I know it is a trivial thing, but I explain that I have been with Birchbox since 2012 and an Ace since 2014 and for her to place blame on the client was completely unacceptable.  She responds by giving me 100 points for my troubles and suddenly appearing very contrite and apologetic.  BUT!  I did ask about anniversary codes in my initial email and she did say they still dole those out....haven't seen my four year one yet....but at this point, I am just hoarding points to get Shu Uemura hair products so, whatever.

In other news, I signed up for Play from Sephora.... 

 

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